It felt like a bandage being ripped off while the wound was still raw. It had become part of my morning routine and, while I didn’t realize it at the time, it was the rock that gave my day a firm foundation. Things are changing again, and we all need to adjust with it.
As a virtual or remote employee since I moved to Virginia about a year ago, the global shut down only changed what I did before and after work. At the beginning of stay at home order, the disruption to my morning routine definitely impacted me and I did struggle to get started in a timely manner. Then Bishop Barron started broadcasting daily Mass from his chapel with either himself or Fr. Grunow of Word on Fire ministries as the celebrant. While it was not live, it premiered at 8:15 every morning. Monday through Saturday (yes, even Saturday!), I would start my day with Mass at the time it premiered. For Sundays, I chose a live streaming Mass as that helped me, at least from a mental perspective, to feel as if I was there and praying the Mass. However, Pentecost Sunday became the last Mass from Bishop Barron’s chapel since California had lifted restrictions for worship services. My beloved daily Mass at home was thus discontinued. Alas, my routine has now changed again.
Part of my struggle with this change is that I prayed Bishop Barron’s Mass with my Dad the day he died. Not having that Mass to participate in anymore is a bit like losing him all over again. While I have been fortunate enough to attend Sunday Mass for the past two weeks in my parish church, the daily Mass in person has not resumed, nor is it offered at a time that I can attend, due to schedule conflicts with work meetings.
Yet I find a bit of divine wisdom in Bishop Barron’s decision not to continue broadcasting daily Mass after Pentecost. It reminds me of the words in Isaiah, “Remember not the events of the past, the things of long ago consider not; See I am doing something new! Now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?” (Is 44:18-19) And just as the church started with a small band of the Apostles and disciples, so too, we start again worshiping in smaller groups at Mass. And if we follow the Spirit’s prompting, we can bring the light and compassion of Jesus to those we do encounter.
“The one who sat on the throne said, ‘Behold, I make all things new.”’ (Rev 21:5) Do we really want to go back to the way we were before? When we open ourselves to God, He can make us new!