In their own eyes

I just finished a Bible study on the book of Judges. This book is definitely not for the faint of heart. Ugly and messy are two polite ways to describe the activities that occur throughout the book. Yet if one didn’t know it was from the Bible, one could think it was a recount of the news of today.

There are a few repeated phrases throughout Judges. Early on it states, “And the sons of Israel did what was evil in the sight of the Lord.” (Judg. 2:11) This phrase is used seven times throughout the first 13 chapters, until the account of Samson. The latter portion of the text switches the phase to, “In those days there was no king in Israel; every man did what was right in his own eyes.” (Judg. 17:6) While this phrase is used half as much as the first, it is also the very last line of the book, Judg. 21:25. What does a king have to do with how the people act? That is an interesting question to ponder, and since the phrase pops up several times, it does tend to get stuck in one’s brain.

The account of Judges recalls how, as the Israelites succumbed to the practices of their neighbors instead of following the law Moses received, then the people would fall under the rule of various nations only to cry out to God and be rescued by a person God elevated, a judge. It seemed each time the people fell into sin, it was worse than previous generations. While He did allow them to experience the consequences of their actions, yet God continued to rescue them when they called out to Him. The people were to look upon God as their king and leader, however, each settled within their own tribal land, and their living seemed to be more fractured, especially those who lived among the existing inhabitants. Samson is the last, great judge and thus the shift from just stating the observation that the people were living in an evil manner to the lack of a king heralds that the change is coming. 

The book of Judges is not written at the time of the events, but afterwards, since it is alluding to the kingdom of Israel. A king is a centralized leader, seen as the chief conduit for God on earth. He enforces the laws based on the common understanding that the whole of Israel believes in. God’s moral laws are the foundation for the laws in Israel, and the kings — especially David — united the people under the shared values. While David did sin against God, he also repented and was forgiven. It’s his sons that strayed very far from God’s commandments, which ended with the exile of both the kingdom of Israel as well as the portion that broke off. Having a king did not solve the issue of Israel disobeying God’s commandments; the reiterated phrase underscores the lack of a centralized leader results in man choosing his own way.

Violence and sexual misbehavior are key themes within the various stories comprising Judges. We see similar things in our own time, as many people are choosing to do what is right in their eyes. Not having a centralized moral law leads people to play God and determine their own “right” and “wrong” ways. Instead of a solid, shared code of conduct, the Israelites often used the pagan examples of their neighbors, resulting in a hybrid form of worship that includes both pagan prayers and practices alongside the traditional Jewish ones. It can be easy to look at a micro level down to one family and not think of that situation being an issue, but read in the context of the whole Israelite community, each sin caused a ripple effect throughout the nation. 

God, in the form of Jesus, is our king. He writes His law upon our hearts. It is up to us to choose life and blessings or death and curses by either obeying or disobeying His commandments. As we are about to enter Holy Week, where does our loyalty lie? How has our Lenten practices changed our outlook? Do we seek to do God’s will or are we looking to do what is right “in our own eyes?”

Vainglory

As I was recently listening to a Lenten reflection, one of the words used caught my ear and stuck in my head: vainglory. What a fascinatingly descriptive word! 

While I know I’ve heard the term before, it’s not used in regular parlance today. However, perhaps we should bring it back and use it, since its synonym is rather charged in a secular way. Pride, at least from a cultural perspective, is not a sin, but rather something to be flaunted, especially in regards to alternative values. Yet vainglory paints a picture of how our desires can lead us to sin. All glory should be given to God, as He made us with all the skills and talents we have. Even if we put hard work into accomplishing something, God still gets the glory, as we are a reflection of His creation. We can appreciate and celebrate our accomplishments, but need to practice humility in the praise we receive.

According to Merriam-Webster, the definition for vainglory is, “excessive or ostentatious pride especially in one’s achievements.” Reflecting on what it is doesn’t go deep enough, we also need to reflect on how much we have acted in such a way. It can be easy to deny that we behaved like that, but the sin of vainglory is not just an action, it’s also a driver of our actions. Are we doing things because we will be recognized for what we do or say? We could be doing many good deeds, but if we do them to impress others, or for them to be favorable to us, then we lose out on the grace we could receive in doing the kind acts for the sake of God and neighbor. 

A person who acts with vainglory, seeks honor and praise for themself. However, the drive for glory could be through many different methods: like money, power, or gossip. Perhaps one wants to be the person everyone at work goes to, because they can get the answer to any question. One may say that they’re just helping their fellow employees, but when folks praise their efforts, it’s hard not to make the praise become why one does it. Thus when we receive a compliment, we should immediately thank God ourselves and pass along the praise to Him.  

The stumbling block with vainglory is that it is tied to our hearts and our desires. But like any sin, in order to combat it, we first need to be aware of it. Perhaps we reflect daily or weekly on our actions, or maybe just one at a time, and ponder what prompted us to do or say whatever it is we’re reflecting on. If we can start to recognize when we act out of haste, so as to not to think about why we’re doing something, we can then determine if our intentions were for our own glory. This reflection doesn’t necessarily mean we stop, only that we ask God to lead us and guide us in determining if it is His will and to thank Him afterwards, especially if we have received compliments. 

As we journey through these last weeks of Lent, let us remember the humility Jesus showed in all events of His Passion, Death, and Resurrection. It is Jesus who is our Savior and all glory and praise go to Him, since we can only partake of heaven due His efforts. And He did it for, and through, Love for us, not for the glory we give Him. 

Shared sufferings

Who wants to suffer? Really. If someone asked you if you had a choice between suffering and not, would you choose to suffer? 

During Lent, Catholics are encouraged to practice praying, penance, and almsgiving, and through these, we are to make a sacrifice of ourselves. A sacrifice is to give up or lose something of value, which for me would indicate some sort of suffering. If the sacrifice was valuable, then to give it up would impose a pain or a hardship for at least a brief time. Yet sometimes our sacrifices are more for our own benefit. Since we get to choose what we sacrifice, we can mitigate the suffering it entails. The Church asks us to abstain from eating meat on Fridays, but do we instead use it as an opportunity to splurge on lobster, crab, or scallops instead? Do we wait until we account for all our bills for the month and then any leftover funds are used to give alms? Or do we pay attention to what we are purchasing and for superfluous items consider giving that amount to charity instead? Do we actively pray to forgive those who we find issues with, be it a family member, a coworker, or a politician in the news? 

This month the Magnificat devotional I use is profiling saints who received the stigmata for the saint of the day. Some saints are well known to have received it, like St. Francis of Assisi and Padre Pio of Pietrelcina. One that caught my attention was St. Rita of Cascia who received a wound of a thorn from the crown of thorns. She meditated upon and felt close to the sufferings of Jesus even before receiving this share in His sufferings. It makes me wonder if I’m a product of my generation where we seek comfort and convenience and avoid any type of suffering. I can’t imagine asking Jesus to participate in His sufferings. While I attempt to accept the sufferings that I encounter in my own life, I often buckle under the weight of it and ask God to relieve me of the burden. I get grumpy and impatient in my struggles, falling far short of the ideal these saints demonstrate.

In this season when we do focus much more on the Passion of Jesus, we may look with sympathy and appreciation that He suffered to be our Savior. Yet have you ever imagined if Jesus asked you to participate in that suffering, what would you choose? Would it be the constant weeping of blood from hands, feet, and/or side? Would it be the pain from the lashings of the Roman soldiers? Perhaps like St. Rita, would it be the agony of the crown? Maybe it would be a shoulder sore from the rubbing of the rough wood and the weight of the cross beam. Our sufferings in daily life cannot be compared to the suffering of Jesus, but we can offer them to Jesus as a share in His. He walks with us no matter what we are going through. When we fully trust in Him we can walk with Him, even in the most painful of circumstances, since it is only through the great Passion and Death that we can celebrate the Resurrection.

Comfort in chains

Lent is a wonderful time to dig deeper into the sins that we find… well comfortable. These are habitual sins that we are so used to, sometimes we cannot even see them as sins. 

In this time of focus, even though we still go about our daily lives, Lent provides us an opportunity to seek out one sin that keeps rupturing our relationship with God. Sin is always a choice. It’s also something of grave matter, although humans are really good at justifying what constitutes grave matter from their perspective. Let’s use the example of gossip. It’s very easy in a conversation to listen or to repeat information about others that should not be shared. What’s the harm in that, you may ask? It is an injustice of that person’s dignity. It may seem like a trifle passing, but it shapes the way we perceive that person. It can also lead us to passing an unfounded judgement on them, especially if the information ends up not being true. Even the smallest sin of listening to gossip can lead to greater ones, and starts a slow turn away from God. 

We may have started out Lent with wanting to practice a particular sacrifice or prayer routine, but how often have we kept it up? Since we’re just 2 weeks into Lent, maybe it has been fruitful since it’s still new. As we progress further into the season, these new practices will become harder. It may be that we have a break in the momentum and fail to keep up our practice. Does that mean we throw in the towel and hope we can do it next year? No! We begin again. And we begin again. We keep restarting all through Lent (and maybe beyond!). These practices are supposed to develop us so that we can be more open with God. When we slide back on what we committed to, we’re basically telling the Father, who gave us everything we have, that He’s not important enough for us to try harder. 

It can seem easy to say that for the course of Lent we’re going to spend more time in reflection using a Lenten booklet or one of the many podcasts available. Are we choosing these items because they are easy and will fit into our lives? Or are we choosing them because they will allow us to get closer to God? Even if we have started with one of these practices, diving into deeper reflection to identify what continually turns us away from God is a pursuit well worth taking. There may be many more comfortable sins than we’re able or want to admit. But if we use the sensitivity that we already practice in making sure we abstain from meat on Fridays and fast on Good Friday, we may be able to find where we fall short of being truly connected with God. We can’t do it alone, however, so praying for the grace to see the most comfortable, habitual sin we have in order to identify when we choose it and avoid those circumstances.  

Habitual sins are comfortable for us, yet they keep us chained to ourselves, relying on ourselves, and not seeking out God. With the month or so we have left, which is plenty of time, let us ask God what is the sin that we need His help the most in addressing. It will require us to step outside of our comfort zone, but we also may find ourselves free to turn to God, to run to Him, and to become comfortable leaning on God.

The road home

For many, the road home can be filled with excitement and joy at the prospect of seeing family and friends. But what was it like for the prodigal son?

The Hallow app has a Lenten reflection that I’ve been following and part of it is about the parable of the prodigal son. One of the first days of reflection included a slow reading of the gospel story, encouraging listeners to really place themselves into the story. What caught my attention was the travel the son had to do in order to return home, and many questions came to my mind.

Lonely. The way home must have felt terribly lonely for the young man. How different it must have been in comparison to when he initially set out. Then his pockets were full of money and promise. In the thrill of excitement, did he realize that he was traveling alone then? Or did he make friends because he could treat others with his inheritance? Yet on the return trip there must have been a heaviness to his spirit, weighed down with his experience and embarrassment at what he was reduced to: a hired hand. Even if he did join up with a band of travellers, did he socialize with them or did he keep his silence? Perhaps he may have hid his feelings behind the stories of his experience, careful to be entertaining but not open enough to share completely.

Confident. The son learned a hard lesson that not everyone treats others as generously as his father did. It took a squandered inheritance to see how incredibly difficult life is. Growing up in the love his father showed, not just for his family, but to all who crossed his path, the boy expected that same treatment from everyone. In that foreign place as a caretaker of pigs, he experienced the harsh reality that others are not nearly as generous as his father. Yet in these deep thoughts, he felt that if he could return home, his father would hire him. Was it because he learned to work hard? Or did he know how much his father loved him and felt that he could not ask to return as a son, but could have a decent life if he asked to be a hired hand? 

Fearful. How much of a struggle was it for the young man to return home? Was he afraid of how his brother and the other hired hands would treat him? How many times did he turn around or at least pause to reconsider if this was the right thing to do? Maybe the question was more like, “what am I thinking?!” Did he travel straight home, or was it more of a meandering journey, dreading the unknown response?   

The story of the prodigal son is our story of how we sin and return to God. Do we find it a lonely path back to God because of the weight of our sins? The parable tells us that the son still had quite a bit of travelling to do when his father spotted him and ran to him. Do we recognize that God is on the look out for our return and wants to run to us and shower us with grace and blessings? Do we have the same confidence of the prodigal son that God will welcome us back? Or do we keep his mercy at a distance because we cannot forgive ourselves? Are we afraid to turn back to God? Do we fear the changes necessary to eliminate sin, especially habitual sins, from our lives? 

Lent is the perfect time to search our hearts and identify what keeps us from truly returning to God. Let the example of the prodigal son lead us to a greater introspection and to celebrate the sacrament of reconciliation with the same depth and joy as the young man received upon his return. The Father is waiting with open arms.

What is the cross?

Welcome to Lent! Over the course of the next six or so weeks, Catholics will be focused on fasting, prayer, and almsgiving, including various devotionals to assist their Lenten journey. All paths, however, lead to Good Friday and the cross. But what is the cross?

Countless reflections have been written about the cross over the centuries, and I’m sure many more will follow in the future. However, I think it’s important for each person to examine the various meanings of the cross so that they can be open to Jesus’ guidance when He uses it. One perspective that I find comforting is the cross as the shepherd’s staff. After all, Jesus did call Himself the Good Shepherd, and any good shepherd will have a staff in hand. Most bishops and cardinals carry a shepherd’s crook during liturgical celebrations, illustrating they are the shepherds in Jesus’ name for their geographic area. Typically a shepherd uses a staff for guidance, either of the whole flock or to separate a few sheep from the herd. A staff is gentle enough not to spook the sheep, but strong enough to encourage the most stubborn of sheep to follow the shepherd. When we object and complain about the challenges and trials of life, we are like the ornery sheep who are resisting the guidance of the shepherd. Yet when we lean into Jesus and surrender to His Will, Jesus will guide us through the tribulations (not remove them) and we will be blessed with the fruits and graces the surrender brings to us. 

Perhaps the most obvious is the cross as a device of execution. It cannot be stated more bluntly than its purpose was Jesus’ death. Jesus really and truly died. We cannot have the resurrection of Easter without the death on Good Friday. All four Gospels are in agreement with that fact, as well as many of the letters in the New Testament. Skeptics, under the heresy of Docetism, doubted that Jesus had a real body and could die, but the early Church condemned this perspective, and does so every time this surfaces as an objection to the Church’s teaching. 

Another way of looking at the cross is as the tree of life. While this might seem the exact opposite of an execution device, it is through the death of Jesus that we can have eternal life. The fruit of the cross is dying to one’s desires so that we can do God’s Will instead of our will. Another fruit is the life of the Church and all the sacraments that sustain us during our earthly pilgrimage. We are baptized with the sign of the cross and are sealed with the oil of chrism in that same way in confirmation. In confession we are absolved through that sign and the form of a cross is used during the anointing of the sick. Our entire spiritual life revolves around the cross, not because it is a sign of death, but because it allows us to be saved and enter eternity with God.

Lastly, one can consider the cross the throne of Jesus. Because Jesus accepted His Passion and Death, the cross became His throne, His way of bringing the Kingdom of God to earth. His throne served as a bridge between physical life on earth and the spiritual realm. As beings with both bodies and souls, living with a focus just on the physical life is like only living half a life. To be fully alive is to embrace both the physical world as well as the spiritual. Through Jesus, we have access to God and the spiritual realm. On this throne, Jesus dispenses forgiveness and mercy, both to the thief who acknowledges his sinfulness as well as those actively persecuting Jesus in their stubborn ignorance. Jesus bestows blessings and graces by giving His Mother to be a Mother to us all. 

The cross is many things. As we progress through Lent this year, let us pause and remember both the tragedy and beauty of the simple intersection of two pieces of wood that Jesus used to transform the world in every age. May we be humbled by its power and rejoice in the fruitfulness of its blessings. 

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Reflections of light

As Christians, we are called to reflect the light of Christ in the world around us. How many of us, in order to not make waves in society, instead put our light under the “bushel basket?”

In the past few months, light reflections have been something I’ve noticed on a daily basis. After my cat Vera passed last spring, I adopted a female cat, Victoria, and then about two months later a male kitten, Marley. Everything is new to Marley and his most recent discovery is light reflections, be that from a car door that opens in the parking area outside the house, or when my phone reflects the light from a nearby lamp. It’s cute until he tries jumping up the wall trying to capture it. While Victoria seems to watch with a bit of disdain for a useless cause, I admire his persistence and his focus. I’m starting to wonder if I have those same qualities when it comes to living my faith. He can sit and watch the wall for an hour, chatting as if to encourage the return of whatever caused the light beam to show itself. Do I make use of the opportunities to grow in my faith, to spend time in silent prayer with an open heart ready to receive God’s guidance for me? 

In Marley’s youthful inexperience, he allows his focus on the light beam to direct his moves, even when there could be negative consequences. I’ve started avoiding using my phone at night, as that seems to cast the reflected light on the ceiling, and Marley is trying to figure out the best way to reach it. While the cat tree is tensioned to the ceiling, it’s thankfully not in the area where the light is reflected. Yet Marley climbs to the top of the tension pole to the ceiling as if getting to the same height will allow him to capture his prize. Do I put my focus on Jesus to lead the way? Or do I look at what’s going on in my surroundings and doubt what can be achieved? God created us with a soul for faith and a mind for reason, and we should be using both equally to do God’s will. 

Marley has also noticed when shadows disrupt light. These too he has gone after, trying to capture the dark spot on the wall. How often are we tempted to chase the shadows? They are a curiosity and we often try to capture them not because we want them, but because they are different and we want to know more about them. But shadows are not from God and will lead us away from our purpose. While it’s important to notice the shadows in our lives, it’s best to seek God’s counsel as to how to address them so they will not be a temptation for us. 

Our modern society allows us to illuminate night as if it were daytime. Artificial light can be a blessing, especially on short, winter days. Yet there are many artificial lights that compete for our attention, so that we forget our relationship with Jesus and pursue lights that dazzle our eyes and quickly fade. They leave us empty and searching for peace. Jesus is the Light of the world and His Word is a lamp for our feet. When we seek to follow Him, He will guide our steps, even when the way gets rough and challenging.

Next week begins the Lenten season. Perhaps a practice for this year could be to seek out opportunities to let Christ’s light shine through your life.  

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Be a witness

Christians are called to mirror Christ in their lives, so that by their word, deed, and even their being, others can see Christ in them. One of the ways to describe this is: witness. What does it mean to be a witness of Christ? 

According to Merriam-Webster, witness is both a noun and a verb, and has several meanings for each type. Many times we think of a witness as who we are but not what we do as Christians, yet it is both. Before we can take action as a witness, we first need to be one. One of the many definitions of the word is one who has personal knowledge of something. As Catholics, we are called to the most intimate relationship with God through the Eucharist. At Mass and through praying and reading Scripture, we come to have a personal relationship with Jesus, unique to each one of us, where we are in whatever state of life we are in. We cannot be Christ’s hands and feet on earth, if we don’t know Him and what He calls us to do. A relationship is not a once-and-done thing we obtain, but rather a continuous process of seeking to know Jesus ever deeper in all of life’s circumstances. 

Often Catholics shy away from the term evangelize, because it sounds too forceful, they feel they lack enough knowledge, or public speaking fills them with dread. However evangelizing and witness share a common bond. One of the definitions of witness is one who gives evidence. While some may think of standing on street corners and trying to convince people to go to church as evangelization, it’s not the only method. When we share our personal experience of how Jesus has worked in our lives, that is being a witness to Christ and evangelizing to others. Evangelization is not meant to tell people what to do, but rather to invite them to have similar experiences by welcoming Jesus into their lives. Being a witness requires us to open up and share our experiences rather than to keep them for ourselves and our memories. Sharing as a witness to Christ working in our lives doesn’t need to be flashy or extreme, it just needs to be honest and personal. 

While many people can cross our paths throughout a day in our life, we won’t be able to talk to each person who sees us about Jesus. Our actions play an equal role in being a witness that Jesus lives in us and we are trying to reflect Him to the world. The Commandments, the Beatitudes, and the Corporal and Spiritual works of mercy all exemplify a Christ-centric spirit, even if we do not say a word to another. Instead of seeking to please ourselves, our focus is doing God’s will and sharing His blessings with others. In that way, a witness is not just what we are but rather what we do. 

When we witness to our faith and hope in God, we are making tangible the proof of a living God. We do not ask others to accept God because of the blessings He has provided to us, but rather to seek a relationship with Him so that they, too, can become a witness and share the unique wonders God has worked in their lives. 

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Don’t fear the storm

No one would consider it a miracle. However, since man cannot control the weather, and we know that the wind and waves obeyed Jesus’ command, I’m still going to call it a miraculous event. At the very least, it was an answered prayer.

Last weekend the weather forecast for the Richmond, Virginia area included every form of winter precipitation in nature’s arsenal. First there would be heavy snow, followed by sleet, but the worst was anticipated to be hours of freezing rain coating all the trees and power lines. The message was not just about expecting power outages, but that it would be days of the power being out, since the weather after the storm would be below freezing for most of the day and lows in the teens to single digits, making it hard for crews to repair the damages. I’d like to say that I wasn’t worried and that I just left it in God’s hands but I can’t. 

Perhaps the experience of losing power for a significant portion of the day in a much smaller storm last year fed my fears. I was anxious. I was trying to figure out how to pray. Did I ask for God to make the storm all snow? After growing up in Pennsylvania, I can handle a large dump of snow. And it wasn’t the snow or sleet that I feared, it was the freezing rain and the persistent cold temperatures. What if I lost power? What if my pipes froze and burst? Without heat, the threat of frozen pipes would be more of a when it would happen rather than if it would happen. Do I pray that I don’t lose power or that I don’t have an issue with my pipes? Or do I ask God to be with me in whatever happens and try not to think about what all the negative outcomes? 

As the weekend neared, I found myself either reading or hearing songs that contained lyrics that mentioned “Don’t fear the storm.” Each time, I would ask myself is that what I’m fearing? Honestly, yes, I was fearing the storm. I know that God has helped me through good times and challenging times, and I know He would be with me every minute of the storm. Imagining what I would need to deal with if a tree fell on the house due to the weight of the ice coating, it was hard to abandon those fear-mongering thoughts. Yet I was also given an opportunity; I could prepare for days without power and without a way to cook food. I gathered water and baked bread and items that could be eaten cold. I wrapped the outside faucet to protect it. I did all my laundry and ran the dishwasher, so that I didn’t have the machines going when the power cut out. In all that preparation, I was reminded that we’re called to do the same for heaven. Our whole life on earth is meant for us to prepare for heaven, to be with God for eternity. Do I prepare for heaven like I’m preparing for this storm? Do I fear the outcome of hell with as much adversity as I was fearing dealing with frozen pipes?

Although meteorology is a science, it can be incorrect. Thankfully the predicted half-inch or more of freezing rain was largely substituted with sleet. While it has made a mess of sidewalks and roadways, sleet bounces off trees and power lines and Richmond was spared a catastrophe. While we’re not back to our normal balmy weather, and I’m still dripping my kitchen faucet at night to try and prevent frozen pipes due to the severe cold, I thank God the power stayed on for most everyone in the area. I’m sure there were others in the Richmond area praying that we would be spared great difficulties and those prayers were answered. I know other states did not fare as well as the Richmond area, and I pray God will assist them in their needs, especially as it looks like there is another winter storm heading our way this weekend. While this one is forecasted to be all snow, if it does come our way, I hope that I can approach it with more confidence that God will see me through. Yes, I do need to remain prepared as that is the prudent thing to do. 

God is bigger than any natural storm, be it a winter storm, or a storm of trials. We will face all sorts of storms throughout our lifetime. Each one is an opportunity to lean on our faith and hope in God. It can be challenging, since we have no control over storms or their outcomes. Sometimes we will give into anxious thoughts and feelings and other times we do our best to quelle thoughts that lead us away from the peace of God. When it is all over, let us praise God regardless of the outcome. Each storm is an opportunity to prepare for heaven, let us not fear the practice.

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No tear wasted

Throughout the Scriptures we are told to cry out to God and that no tear will be wasted. I’ve been pondering a recent juxtaposition of events and how God uses tears to soften our hearts.

I do enjoy my fiber crafts, but last year I didn’t have much opportunity to weave. As a result, I was a bit rusty in dressing the loom, reducing me to frustration and tears. It was ugly crying over nothing really. I think my frustration was not that I was struggling, but that I didn’t understand what I was doing to cause the issue. If I can learn from a mistake, then as annoying as it is, I can chalk it up to experience. But it was an issue I had faced several times and I’m still none the wiser. After what seemed like hours of trying and making no progress, I thought about how Mary would have woven the clothes for the Holy Family. I asked Momma Mary for guidance, but instead received persistence. It did take several days to completely finish the process, but I did make significant progress after my prayer. It may not be the best I’ve done, but at least I haven’t wasted the yarn. I won’t know how successful I’ve been until I’ve completed the project. 

After struggling with the loom for most of Saturday, I went to the vigil Mass. There were a number of children present and audible, but there was one who was particularly vocal. The child was old enough to talk, but still young enough to wail. I’m not sure what upset him, but he was crying with every fiber of his being. Thinking back to my crying bout earlier in the day, I could totally understand how he was feeling. He was spent and the only emotion he had left were his tears. Not that I was counting, nor did I look to see, but I believe his parent removed him about three times from Mass when he began wailing. I said a prayer for him. Then I said a prayer for his parents. I do commend his parents for bringing him to Mass and not leaving after his first cry. It would have been easy for them to say that they tried and didn’t want to disturb the congregation. But Mass is not about making things easy for us, it’s about putting God first and being nourished by Word and Sacrament. Is a crying child any different than our own thoughts that distract us at Mass?

I can’t say that I’m always this tolerant with distractions at Mass, but I feel like God was giving me an opportunity to learn to be more compassionate towards others. I was also able to appreciate how Father kept going no matter what part of the Mass it was, without stumbling over words or pausing during the disruptions. He may have spoken a bit louder in the microphone to make sure his words could be heard over the crying, but he displayed no evidence of annoyance or frustration of the circumstances. Sometimes I get distracted by my own thoughts when speaking, so to be able to concentrate on praying the Eucharistic prayers over a loudly crying child must be a gift of the Holy Spirit given to a priest. Glory to God for that blessing!

I’m sure there were members of the congregation who were displeased with the crying child and his family. But we are called to cry out to God in our distress, and perhaps that child is a reminder to all that we need to do exactly that. As adults we can cry out silently in our hearts and souls at Mass for our deepest needs and petitions. “My wanderings you have noted; are my tears not stored in your flask, recorded in your book?” (Psalm 56:9) Regardless of the cause of our tears, God shares in them, walking with us, and supporting us even if we can’t feel Him.  

Many times after a good cry there is a sense of release of the stress and anxiety that brought us to tears. It’s not quite peace, but rather an emptying of those negative emotions so that we can return to the issue at hand with a calmer demeanor. Tears may not solve the issues we have, but they are a gift from God to help us understand when we do need help and to lean on Him because He does care for us. Tears are never a waste and they are definitely not wasted when we lift them, and our challenges, up to God. He will see us through and as the Book of Revelation promises, “He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there shall be no more death or mourning, wailing or pain, [for] the old order has passed away.” (Rev 21:4)