Why can’t God work with negativity?

We should always strive to do our best in all aspects of our lives as we offer our daily activities to God. But what happens when we fall short? 

The other morning was really tough. The alarm clock sounded, and it was a struggle to get out of bed. As I picked up my Magnificat to say my morning prayers, I realized that I really didn’t even feel like doing that. I can’t say that I really wanted to do something else, except perhaps going back to sleep. Since that was not an option, I tried to push down those uncooperative feelings and concentrate on the readings. During the few moments of contemplation after reading, I thought about everything I didn’t want to do: get up, eat breakfast, work in the home office, or even to pray. I was trying to ask God for grace, patience, enthusiasm, anything to get me through the day. However, when I thought about how much I really didn’t want to pray, that made me very upset. How can God do anything when I don’t even want to pray?

“So be perfect, just as your heavenly Father is perfect,” said Jesus. (Matt 5:48) My attitude, thoughts, and feelings were so far away from perfection at that moment. But just as quickly as I thought that God couldn’t help me because of my poor attitude, the next thought was, “Why not?” God is perfect. He is perfect Love. He wants to help me, bless me, and have His will completed in the person I am. It is only when I limit what He can do with a defeatist attitude. Even then, I’m not completely on my own. Jesus’ descriptive declaration of the Father’s perfection is the culmination of a discourse on loving our enemies. He reminds us that Father “makes His sun to rise on the bad and the good, and causes the rain to fall on the just and the unjust.” (Matt 5:45) God’s blessings are not just for those who “earn” it; if they were, I don’t think there would be many blessings in the world. 

It’s times like that when we need to stop and think about the situation. I was trying. I may not have had the best attitude, but I didn’t completely skip my prayer time. I asked for what I needed to get me through the day, committing myself to trying and placing my day in His hands. Was I joyful about it? No. Unfortunately I could not rouse myself to that feeling. But faith is not a feeling. It’s a relationship with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. God understands our human limitations and knows that relationships with humans will have ups and downs. All He asks is that we try and trust in His care. 

Rise up

This past weekend, the gospel reading from Matthew contained several parables. As I was listening, there was one that really jumped out at me, even though I’ve heard it hundreds of times before. Comprising two sentences, this single verse spoke anew to the baker in me.

“He spoke to them another parable. ‘The kingdom of heaven is like yeast that a woman took and mixed with three measures of wheat flour until the whole batch was leavened.’”

Matthew 13:33

Whenever you read reflections for this parable, Jesus is the yeast. He is the one causing the growth, and that makes logical sense, especially to one who does not bake. I’m not going to argue with the Church Fathers that this perspective is incorrect, but rather would like to offer another point of view. 

What caught my attention was the precise delineation of the amount of wheat flour: three measures. When details are given in the gospels, they can be easily skimmed over and overlooked, but they often have a deeper meaning. It’s not just that the yeast was added to wheat flour (another precise detail), but a specific count of three. What else comes to mind when we think about the count of three? To me, it was Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. So if Jesus, the Son, is one of the measures of flour, what then is the yeast? That would be each of us. Think about being mixed with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit until the heavenly kingdom is  leavened, that is, we rise.

The other major detail is that it’s not just any flour that the yeast is mixed with, but rather the flour is from wheat. It is the composition of the wheat flour that gives the yeast the food it needs to be able to do its job of creating carbon dioxide, which causes bread to rise. By itself, yeast can do nothing. It requires food, and only when it has an abundance of food, can it perform to the best of its ability. We require God; our nourishment from having a relationship with Him feeds us so that we can be the best version of ourselves and perform the good works that He asks of us. The more we feed on God, in prayer and in the Sacraments, the more we can leaven the bread of His Kingdom. 

Wheat and bread are common references throughout scripture. Each example illustrates a different aspect of our relationship with God. It’s amazing when you take something so simple as one verse of scripture and in reflection be impacted so powerfully and overwhelmingly, just by looking at it from a different perspective. 

Banking on Love

I don’t think I want to win the lottery. I was watching an episode of HGTV’s My Lottery Dream Home, enjoying seeing the different house offerings, and started to think about what it could be like to win from a scratch-off ticket or a Powerball drawing. 

What’s nice about the show, is that families who participate are not usually seeking multi-million dollar homes. Sometimes they really are the underdogs, who are just getting by and renting a home that is way too small for them. When they have the opportunity to choose to own a home that is much more roomy and has enough private space for each person, you can’t help but to share their joy. Yet sometimes it seems that the lure of the culture’s call for bigger and better weighs more heavily in the deciding factor. 

As the families walk through the various homes, it’s hard not to make judgements about what one likes personally. I know the decision has already been made, but I try to pick one, either that I like, or that I think they liked the best, and see if that is what they ended up choosing. During a recent episode, I started thinking, what would I do if I won a scratch-off ticket for one million dollars? I’d like to say that after taxes, I would set some aside for home improvements and travel and then donate the rest to select Catholic charities. While that sounds like a good plan, how much would be “enough” for what I want to do with my home and my travels? 

As my brain spun in all different directions pondering this, I realized that all the lottery would do is give me a false sense of financial security. It would also remove from me the ability to trust God for all my needs, not just spiritually, but also financially. We may look at the story of the widow giving the two small coins and Jesus’ praise of her (Mk 12:41-44) and think we always need to share, and that is one lesson to learn from it. Perhaps another lesson is that we need to trust that God will give us all we need, even when it seems that we have less than those around us. 

When we hear one of the most famous sayings of Jesus, “Then repay to Caesar what belongs to Caesar and to God what belongs to God,” (Mt 22:21) we may think that money doesn’t matter to God and it is separate from Him. But everything that we have is a gift from God. In reality, everything is His — including any money, even that of our paycheck. God has given us the ability and skills to make a living. Work is something that God commanded Adam to do in the garden of Eden. It was only after the fall that work became burdensome. If we trust God and pray for guidance to use our monetary resources to best meet His will, He will bless us. We just have to remember that God’s blessings are not always earthly ones, nor are they aligned with what our culture deems as a success. 

It’s no sin to dream about the possibilities of a lottery dream home, as long as we don’t live with the expectation that it will happen and forget to live in the present. We pray in thanksgiving for our homes, despite any flaws or imperfections we see. We also pray in petition to God to help those who are in need of a home, for whatever reason, and for guidance to help in whatever ways we can. 

Making changes

Tired of wearing a mask everywhere you go? Frustrated at the limitations imposed in a phased return to how things used to be? For me, I did follow the stay-at-home restrictions to the point where I had my groceries delivered. Now that I have been out and about for a few weeks, the novelty of the restrictions has worn off. However, as routine has slipped back into something more comfortable, reflecting on the world’s health crisis has given me a different perspective on making changes.

Not that there is a one-to-one correlation, but the pandemic has brought to light just how different people interpret information they receive. If you ask people if they believe in God, a being they can’t see, can’t hear, and can’t touch, some are going to say yes, some are going to say no, and some will fall somewhere in between. For a Catholic, I have such a hard time fathoming those who don’t believe in God. However, it is just the same with COVID-19; some believe it, some do not, and some take the middle ground. 

For those who doubt this virus’ impact, the inconvenience is costing them time and money. They are eager for things to go back to the way they were. Perhaps there was a level of control they felt they had and they want to recapture it. They will not accept that there is a virus, no matter how many statistics are quoted nor pictures of the virus are shown. They may not even change their mind if someone in their close circle of acquaintances succumbs to the virus. Because they don’t believe in any of this, they resist all changes.

For those who accept there is a pandemic and have a sense of what it has done in other parts of the world, wearing face coverings and disposable gloves, standing six feet from others, and keeping all interactions to the minimal time possible, these changes are almost eagerly accepted so that daily life can go on. They accept the personal protection gear, not only because it may protect them, but also so that it protects those with whom they come into contact. Making changes is a natural expectation. The changes may not always be enthusiastically welcomed, but rather humbly received.

The middle ground sometimes sounds like it’s the best place to be. However, it can be the most dangerous. Not fully accepting and not completely rejecting, there is no basis for changes to be received. This tepidness will see any changes that are made quickly vanish once a perceived sense of normal, or the way things used to be, is achieved. It becomes more of what other people are doing and expect, than what is the best thing to do. When around the doubters, any social distancing measures will be forgotten. When asked to wear masks and social distance, an attempt is made to follow, but there is no consciousness that makes them aware of their surroundings to truly execute the requirements. 

God made each of us unique and loves us just as we are at any moment. However, He never asks us to stay as we are, but rather to grow closer to Him. Being closer requires us to make changes to our lives, our thoughts, and our plans. Let us pray for the grace to humbly accept all the changes He asks of us and rejoice as we grow closer to Him. 

Gather us in

From the beginning, there was separation. Let me rephrase that, after the fall of Adam and Eve, there was separation. Knowledgeable of what they did, they separated themselves from God by hiding. Thankfully, God never gets tired calling us back.

In God’s wisdom, He knew that He could not send Jesus down to earth without preparation. It began with one man, Abraham, with whom He made a covenant. His family flourished and became a tribe that grew into a nation. That nation was to be a light for all humanity to follow back to a relationship with God. Instead, it became about rules & regulations, who was clean — that is who was socially acceptable, and who was to be avoided. Even those who were descendants of Abraham, the Samaritans, were looked down upon by the Jewish people in those times.

Jesus’ main audience was the Jewish community, however, He did heal those outside of the community who showed great faith in Him, like the centurion. He spoke to the Samaritan woman at the well, calling her to belief in Him through conversation over a drink of water. Jesus came to gather us together. The Apostles and the early Church had to navigate through rough waters to figure out how Jews and Gentiles could worship together and become a single faith community. It’s a constant struggle, even 2,000 years later.

Why is it so hard for humans to follow Jesus’ example of gathering people together? It may sound a bit cliche to say, “the devil made me do it,” but there may be some truth to that. The root of the word devil basically means “to reach by throwing apart, let fly apart, strike.” (Merriam-Webster dictionary). Bishop Barron has often remarked that the word means to scatter. That is what sin does, it scatters us and breaks us apart, pitting us one against another.

When we are faced with a temptation that separates us from God or others, that is the signal that sin is in our midst. Perhaps it’s our sin, perhaps it comes from another person. As Christians, we are called to resist the temptation, seek the courage, grace, and peace of God to heal the division. In this way, we will bring together our family, our neighborhood, our community, and our world. We may not see peace and unity in all aspects of humanity in our lifetime, but we can still try to bring a little heaven down to earth.

Undivided unity

By my parents, my heritage is Polish and Lithuanian. However, I love Scotland and have been there several times, and would love to visit again. Does that make me any less of an American? No; the United States is my home. All it does is categorize me within the multitudes of the human race. It does illustrate that I have the ability to not only celebrate my heritage, but to appreciate that of others. There are countless people that have come before me, and an unknown number who will come after me, yet we are all God’s children: unique, diverse, and loved by God.

In Genesis, Adam named all the creatures of the earth. From the beginning we have looked for ways to identify another’s unique traits as well as similarities to others. This action, itself, is not a bad thing. It could actually be good; for if you know someone has a skill you lack, you can seek out their knowledge and abilities when you need them. However, if the purpose is to elevate yourself in comparing yourself to another, it is the intention that makes the action evil. We’re all familiar with the story about the Pharisee that thanks God that he’s not like the tax collector. (Luke 18:9-14) While we should thank God for the skills and blessings He has bestowed on us, we should not  do so at another’s expense. In fact, we are called to share those blessings, especially with those whom our first inclination is to judge. 

“I believe in one, holy, catholic, and apostolic Church.” We say it as part of the Nicene Creed each Sunday and Holy Day at Mass. One of the most beautiful things about Catholicism is that, well, it’s Catholic, that means universal. One candidate of RCIA at my parish is from Croatia and commented that she was surprised that the prayers match from her native language to English. This commonality gives Catholics the ability to travel anywhere on earth, from Rome, Poland and Croatia to Australia, the Philippines and the United States, attend and recognize Mass because it is the same everywhere. Yes, the language may be different, but you can follow along in your native language, praying together as one Church. We can even look to pray in unity with other Christian religions, using the Our Father. We can find common praises to God with those of the Jewish faith using the Psalms. We can also  find common ground with those of the Islamic religion who also claim Abraham as a father in faith, and who have great respect for Job. We can balance the differences amongst the human race as long as we look at what is common between us and don’t hyperfocus exclusively on what makes us different. 

Even in the early Church, Paul had some bold proclamations to the Romans about their behaviors. In chapters 12 through 15, he exhorts the community to live a new life in Christ. In describing the marks of the true Christian, he says, “Let love be genuine; hate what is evil, hold fast to what is good; love one another with brotherly affection; outdo one another in showing honor.” (Rom 12:9-10) Over the course of these chapters, he urges them not to judge one another, not to hinder another and to please others, not themselves. He reminds them that the Gospel is for both Jews and Gentiles alike. Reading and reflecting over these chapters often provides a good base for an examination of conscience and may also show us where we need to grow. 

On the night before Jesus died, He gave us a new commandment, “love one another; even as I have loved you.” (John 13:34) Jesus loved us so much that He gave His life up for us. We are called to love each other with that same passion. For the times we fail, we seek forgiveness. In our times of struggle, we pray for the grace to love as Jesus asks us. And when we make it to heaven, we will not only see God as He is, undivided unity of Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, but we will share in the communion of saints in that same unity. 

Six feet from God?

The “new normal” has us wearing masks, gloves, and staying six feet away from people other than those in our household. They call it social distancing and it’s caused us to be more cognizant of not just our environment, but the people we come across in our daily journeys.

It may be that we need to think we travel in a bubble that keeps us appropriately spaced from others, but has it impacted our relationship with God? While many dioceses have given a general dispensation from the obligation to attend Mass on Sundays, that does not mean we should seek distance from God. He is always calling us to come closer and into a deeper relationship with Him. While six feet may seem very far for friends and relatives, if we were as close as that to the Eucharist in the monstrance during adoration, we may say that’s too close! But God wants us even closer. Bishop Barron has often commented in his videos about the word reconciliation, which shares its root with cilia, or eyelashes, so that the meaning is to see again eyeball to eyeball with God. Now that’s close!

As things start to open up, times and availability may still be limited. We may need to plan a bit more in order to complete our daily tasks. Even more important as going to the gym or the store is our time with God. Even if we delay our return to social tasks, we still need to make sure our routine contains time to spend in prayer, spiritual reading, contemplation, etc. When we return to Mass, we realize that as we receive the Eucharist, God will be a whole lot closer than six feet as we receive the Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity of Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament. He is in us and we are in Him. 

As we pay attention to the physical distance we keep from others for health reasons, we need to keep equally mindful of the strength of our relationships with others. Yes, our social interactions have changed, but they have not been completely destroyed. We need to seek out creative ways to be the Church, that is the Body of Christ, to the world we currently live in. Now may be a time to step outside our comfort zone to say hello to another instead of just smiling. You can still smile as well, while others may not see it behind a mask, the smile comes out in your voice and words. We can still participate in food drives, online prayer groups and Masses to stay connected to our parish and community during this difficult and awkward time. 

The six foot social rule is challenging because we’re not used to it. Yet it may produce the fruits of the Spirit in our relationship with God and those who cross our paths. Let us embrace the challenge and seek to be closer with God and our neighbors, no matter what the physical distance is between us.

From God’s perspective

Have you ever stopped and marveled at God’s creation? Surely, a beautiful sunny day, an amazing sunset on the beach, or even the antics of your favorite of God’s creatures have given you pause for a thank-you to God. But what about all of creation all at once? 

Starting from the largest, there is the universe. Being large and all-encompassing, it’s easier to get the mind focusing on something smaller, like a galaxy. Even there, with so many planets and stars, perhaps it’s better to look at just one planet. If you choose to pick something other than Earth, you may think there is less to be thankful for. A planet is rather large and contains its own atmosphere, so do you start there or start down at the planet surface?  If you’re envisioning  just a bunch of rocks, have you considered the minerals that make up those rocks? And going down yet more levels until you get to the atoms that make up those minerals that make up the rocks. But we know that even atoms are made up of protons and neutrons. Every time science seems to come up with the smallest pieces of what makes something up, there’s a discovery that goes down even further. 

From the universe to the tiny, eenie-weenie subatomic particle, God is the creator of it all. God’s perspective is both the big picture as well as the most miniscule of details. His hand and reflection is in everything that he created. Being a finite human, it’s hard to comprehend the vastness of it all. It’s like trying to see the beauty of a single rose when you’re looking at a garden the size of the ocean. We can’t look at either the entirety of the universe or a subatomic particle, even if we had the best microscope in the world to see it. As humans, we need to pick a focal point. When we take a picture, there may be more than just what’s in focus in the picture. We see it, but not in its entirety. It’s a mere slice of the whole of God’s creation.

God freely shares all of creation with us. A rock gives glory to God just by being a rock, and a bird, just by being a bird. “Are not two sparrows sold for next to nothing? Yet not a single sparrow falls to the ground without your Father’s consent.” (Matt 10:29) God does not just make things and then sit back to eat bon-bons. He is ever watching over and interacting with all His creation, but especially men and women, who He made in His own image. “As for you, every hair of your head has been counted; so do not be afraid of anything. You are worth more than an entire flock of sparrows.” (Matt 10:30-31) 

While we may not be able to see things from God’s perspective, it doesn’t mean we shouldn’t pause to soak in the myriad of life He authored. It’s humbling to consider and at the same time, it’s like a cozy hug, knowing that God knows and loves you even down to every hair on your head. Nothing is too small for God’s notice.

Making all things new

It felt like a bandage being ripped off while the wound was still raw. It had become part of my morning routine and, while I didn’t realize it at the time, it was the rock that gave my day a firm foundation. Things are changing again, and we all need to adjust with it. 

As a virtual or remote employee since I moved to Virginia about a year ago, the global shut down only changed what I did before and after work. At the beginning of stay at home order, the disruption to my morning routine definitely impacted me and I did struggle to get started in a timely manner. Then Bishop Barron started broadcasting daily Mass from his chapel with either himself or Fr. Grunow of Word on Fire ministries as the celebrant. While it was not live, it premiered at 8:15 every morning. Monday through Saturday (yes, even Saturday!), I would start my day with Mass at the time it premiered. For Sundays, I chose a live streaming Mass as that helped me, at least from a mental perspective, to feel as if I was there and praying the Mass. However, Pentecost Sunday became the last Mass from Bishop Barron’s chapel since California had lifted restrictions for worship services. My beloved daily Mass at home was thus discontinued. Alas, my routine has now changed again.

Part of my struggle with this change is that I prayed Bishop Barron’s Mass with my Dad the day he died. Not having that Mass to participate in anymore is a bit like losing him all over again. While I have been fortunate enough to attend Sunday Mass for the past two weeks in my parish church, the daily Mass in person has not resumed, nor is it offered at a time that I can attend, due to schedule conflicts with work meetings.

Yet I find a bit of divine wisdom in Bishop Barron’s decision not to continue broadcasting daily Mass after Pentecost. It reminds me of the words in Isaiah, “Remember not the events of the past, the things of long ago consider not; See I am doing something new! Now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?” (Is 44:18-19) And just as the church started with a small band of the Apostles and disciples, so too, we start again worshiping in smaller groups at Mass. And if we follow the Spirit’s prompting, we can bring the light and compassion of Jesus to those we do encounter.

“The one who sat on the throne said, ‘Behold, I make all things new.”’ (Rev 21:5) Do we really want to go back to the way we were before?  When we open ourselves to God, He can make us new! 

Authoritative act in the Spirit

One of the definitions for the word confirm is: ”to remove doubt about by authoritative act or indisputable fact” (Merriam-Webster). I think that is the perfect definition for what the sacrament of Confirmation is all about. 

Pentecost and Confirmation are closely tied and have been that way from the beginning. In the Acts of the Apostles (8:14-18), Peter and John went to Samaria in order to lay hands and pray that the newly baptized would receive the Holy Spirit. Yet today, many people see Confirmation as a sort of graduation from religious education. We can never truly learn everything there is to know about the infinite God because we are finite human beings; however, that does not mean that we shouldn’t keep trying and learn as much as we are able. 

The ordinary minister of Confirmation is a bishop, as they are seen as the successors of the Apostles, who were first to receive Confirmation directly by the Holy Spirit on Pentecost. Look at how the Holy Spirit affected the Apostles: they traveled far proclaiming the Good News and healing. They did what they saw Jesus do. It is through the prompting of the Holy Spirit they preached the indisputable fact that Jesus is the Christ — the Savior and Redeemer of the world.  

While we do receive the Holy Spirit in baptism, Confirmation is that authoritative act by the bishop that leaves an indelible mark indicating we are Christians. Every Confirmation is just like the visit to Samaria by Peter and John. The bishop, along with the whole Church, prays for the Holy Spirit to descend into the hearts and souls of those being confirmed. We pray that each will know and accept their calling to proclaim and heal in Jesus’ name during their journey of life. 

Pentecost Sunday is an opportunity for us to remember our own Confirmation and to reflect on how the Spirit has prompted us and how well we have listened. Rather than dwelling on any shortcomings, we learn from them and renew our vocation to spread the gospel by the grace the Holy Spirit gives us. There is no doubt that we are Christians, followers of Jesus Christ, as we have been confirmed in the Holy Spirit; we just need to put into practice what we believe.