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Catholic Girl Journey

Learning to Love God

When I first heard the Jars of Clay song, Love Song for a Savior, I was confused. The refrain contains the line, “I want to fall in love with You.” My confusion came from listening to that song with a secular ear. How can a person fall in love with God? There is no courtship, no dating, no hanging out with God the Father, Jesus or the Holy Spirit. I liked the song and it’s an easy, catchy tune that I found myself singing.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church states in the very first paragraph, “He [God] calls man to seek him, to know him, to love him with all of his strength.” We are called to love God, and I thought I did love Him until I heard that song. I realized that to me, God was like another member of the family; I had to love Him, because that’s what I was supposed to do. I didn’t necessarily choose to do so, but just expected that of myself. Hearing the lyrics of the song made me start to wonder how a person could fall in love with God.

During my searching for an answer, I came across the definition of love described by Fr. (now bishop-elect) Robert Barron: “Love is willing the good of the other.” If God is all-good and all-loving how can I will the good of Him? Precisely because He is all-good and all-loving, God only wants the best for us. He knows that left to our own devices, we would fall into chaos. He gave us His commandments, not because He wants to be mean and limiting, but for our benefit. For example, “Remember to keep holy the Sabbath day.” (Exodus 20:8), is not meant for God’s benefit, but that we as humans interacting in the physical world, take the time to seek a spiritual relationship with God, whom we know in a spiritual world. Even Jesus says, “If you love me, you will keep my commandments.” (John 14:15).

So how can we fall in love with God by keeping His commandments? In some respects, it’s not thinking of command as being an order or demand, but rather something that is a choice happily made. As an example I’ll go back to the third commandment. Rather than considering it a burden, or trying to “schedule” Mass so that it’s convenient for us on Sunday, how about planning nothing but going to Mass as the first thing in the day? Let the Spirit move you through the rest of the day. It may be a great exercise even if it’s not realistic in the long run. Try it, for a few weeks.  Perhaps it will be the jumpstart needed to learn to love the commandments. This sort of openness to the Spirit calls for a change of attitude, a change that we have to be willing to make. But even though it is our free will to make the change, we can always ask God to help and support us in our efforts. And someday we may find ourselves saying, “I want to fall in love with You.”

Catholic Girl Journey

The Essence of Mary

In a trip down to Washington, DC, I attended Mass at the Cathedral of St. Matthew the Apostle. The cathedral design is on par with many of those in Europe in its grandness and decor. As the seat of the Archbishop of Washington, it may be familiar to some because Saint Pope John Paul II celebrated Mass there in 1979. Others may know it as the location of President John F. Kennedy’s funeral Mass in 1963. For me, what makes it special is the discovery of the unique statue of Mary that I don’t think I will ever forget.

I have seen many statues of Mary in numerous chapels, churches, cathedrals and basilicas during my travels. Most portray her as serene and prayerful. Others show her maternity by including Jesus in her arms or lap.  Each are beautiful in their own way, although some stir my soul more than others if I think they capture Mary’s essence of prayer and motherhood. However, in the Cathedral of St. Matthew, sculptor Gordon S. Kray portrays Mary “reaching down to fallen humanity and pointing to her ascended Son.” It is so beautifully touching, I could not help the tears that streamed down my face.

Mary at the Cathedral of St. Matthew the Apostle, Washington DC

Mary at the Cathedral of St. Matthew the Apostle, Washington DC

As I knelt before the statue, I felt the urge to reach my hand out to hers. I wanted to say, “take me with you to heaven.” This pure statue of white needs no paint to illustrate Mary alive and still helping man at a personal level. While she may be calling all to her Son, her gaze from the statue is on YOU. It’s like she is saying, “Come, child, take my hand and I will help you. Let us go together to my Son, Jesus.” To me, this is the essence of Mary in her role in the Church today.

Preparing for the Journey

Do you use a checklist when you pack your overnight bag? Making sure you have the essentials like toothpaste, toothbrush, contact lens solution, and daily medications is the easy part. Do you check the forecast for the weather of the destination to see if it will be hot/cold/wet during your stay so you know what kind of clothing to take? I remember being in Italy in April at a location more suited for summer getaways. There was so much marble in the place, it was rather chilly.  It didn’t help that the heat is shut off in Italy in March, no matter what weather is expected. Toward the end of the trip, my clothing choices were limited!

Now, what if you didn’t know where you were going? How would you prepare for the journey? Bring a little of this and a little of that? How would you know when you arrived? What if it is a place that no one has been there and back from? I have admiration for the early explorers like Columbus, who took to the sea in search of a better way to the Indies not knowing what they would find. They were tested daily and  probably had days of doubt. Even the first astronauts making their trip to the moon had at least some idea of journey, but not all the trials and successes along the way.

If faith is a journey, is it possible to “prepare” for the journey? Actually, I think the journey IS the preparation. The faith journey prepares us to spend eternity with God. Since God is Love, we need to spend the time practicing how to love everyone, as we are called to do as Catholics. The journey also gives us practice forgiving those we perceive wrong us, and helping others without begrudging the personal cost or expecting repayment. It is practicing true selflessness. I’m specifically calling it practice, as we all have times of success and times when we fall short. Each day gives us countless opportunities to practice and to prepare for our destination: Heaven.

Catholic Girl Journey

Seek Him First

Priorities. We all have a way of putting things in a particular order, from the way we get up in the morning, to the way we schedule our days, to the way we determine the activities we can and will do. We can say we make God a priority, and sometimes we do, by going to Mass at an extra early hour or by finding a Church when on vacation. But what about seeking God first?

In Matthew 6:25-34, Jesus gives us the directive not to be anxious, ending in the familiar “Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all of these things shall be yours as well.”  These things refer to food and clothing in the passage, but perhaps there are other necessities that fill up our to do lists.  I’ve been thinking about what it really means to seek God first, since I do think I make Him a priority. And over many months of small observations (this is definitely a journey), it has occurred to me that it’s in the way we approach choices at a very basic level. I listened to my parents ask my niece who was a senior in high school, “what do you want to do after college?” I felt like asking her “what does God want you to do after college?”

In my own life I’ve been wondering about my job and whether or not I should be looking for a new position. Given the length of service with the company, it makes it easy to be lazy and stay. Looking for something new means I need to know what I want and that presents a question. What am I looking for? Even in my prayers I found myself asking God what I should do. I knew I needed His help to make a good decision. But I began to realize I was only looking from my perspective, it was all about what I wanted, what I’m interested in, me-me-me. So I had to ask the question differently: what does God want me to do? I have also observed from learning about the lives of various saints, that you don’t ask that question lightly, you need to be truly open to the response. It really takes your relationship with God to a different level, making Him more than just number one in a list of priorities.

To many this may seem like a no-brainer, but to others this is totally overwhelming. The journey of faith is as unique as each individual. While God has given us all special talents and abilities, offering them back to Him to use as He pleases is one way of seeking the kingdom of God first.

Catholic Girl Journey

Daily Joy

“Smile, look like you’re having fun.”  When I first started in the world of work, I used to say this to my co-workers.  They were not thrilled to hear it, although after grousing about it, sometimes the corners of the mouth would start to curl upwards. At the time, I was working in a card and gift shop, and except for the day after Christmas when everything was 50% off and the crowd was uncontainable, it was actually a nice place to be. Why not smile and be happy that the little bit of money we were making would help to offset the cost of college fees?

People communicate mostly through nonverbal means, like tone of voice and facial expressions. I admit, when I’m deep in thought mulling over a challenge, I may have more of a scowl than a smile. But when you’re dealing with other people, a smile goes a long way. It may even be the only bright spot in a day filled with challenges and disappointments. Recently while I was dealing with some health issues and was working from home, it was all too easy for me to express my crankiness at not being well. Since it’s just me at home, who am I hurting if I’m cranky, right? I received a mailing from the Society of the Little Flower, which had the following printed on the envelope, “Even when alone be cheerful, remembering always that you are in the sight of the Angels.” – St. Therese of Lisieux. OUCH! It felt like a finger pointing directly at me. It also made me realize that if I don’t try to be cheerful and smile at home, how can I ever expect to have it come naturally when I’m around others?

At the birth of Jesus, the angel proclaimed to the shepherds, “Do not be afraid; for behold, I proclaim to you good news of great JOY that will be for all the peoples.” (Luke 2:10, emphasis added) Are we afraid to live a life of joy and spread it generously? We often get so encumbered in our daily challenges that we forget the joy that living a life in Christ has brought us. We miss out at enjoying the blessings we have: life and breath, hope and love. The joy of Christmas is not meant for one day, but everyday. We especially celebrate it once a year to remember that most special day and re-energize our joy to spread through the upcoming year.

My trademark now is wishing people a happy <whatever> day, and yes, I do wish folks a Happy Monday. I have had the response of, “It’s Monday, how can it be happy?” However at the end of the work week, most people don’t mind when I wish them a Happy Friday. It’s not so much that the day itself is happy, but that I’m wishing folks happiness throughout the day, whatever it brings: a little happiness or much happiness. I am wishing them well in their day. Sometimes I’ll hear someone at work wish another a “Happy Tuesday.” I don’t know if they are picking it up from me or elsewhere, but it makes me smile to hear it.

Smiles, cheerfulness, joy and happy wishes, are all part of spreading the love of God to our neighbor. And since this is posted on Wednesday, dear reader, I wish you a Happy Wednesday.

Catholic Girl Journey

The Healing Touch of God

In a prayer he composed to recite before saying Mass,  St. Thomas Aquinas says he comes, “as one infirm to the physician of life.” One doesn’t necessarily think that a saint would be infirm or sick, especially approaching Mass. Yet that is what we all are, since we are all sinners.

Sickness, disease and wounds have all been physical metaphors for sin. There are numerous Psalms (6 & 32 come to mind) that speak of physical ailments and call for God to heal the soul. But in this age of modern medicine and technology, can this metaphor be maintained? Actually, I think it may even enhance the way we look at sin and the struggle we have against it.

God is the Divine Physician, but healing may not come overnight.  Sometimes, it’s a lifelong process or “treatment” like for someone who has high blood pressure. It needs to be monitored, and medication and diet changes may be needed to keep it under control. For other sins, God may need to do a bit of “surgery” on us that could leave some scars. It takes time to heal after surgery and for the scars to lessen, but they may not ever really go away. In a way, those scars can remind us of the pain and suffering a particular sin caused and help us better avoid it in the future. And other sins can be like overindulging in food; we can’t avoid it since it is necessary to live, but we can be on guard of the temptation to eat too much.

A sin can be both simple and complex. It’s all too easy to look at the 10 commandments superficially and say that you follow them all. But take a closer look, and they go much deeper than just the words. For example, “You shall not kill,” is not just about not taking a life, but about being life-giving, treating people with  the respect and dignity they deserve as children of God. It’s also about forgiving those who may have injured us.

Jesus once answered the Pharisees by saying, “Those who are well do not need a physician but the sick do. I did not come to call the righteous but sinners.” (Mark 2:17). Jesus is calling us, you and me. He wants us! He wants to heal us. He want to forgive our sins and tell us, “do not sin again.” (John 8:11) But in order for that to happen, we need to present our sins to Him, admitting the bad habits and ugliness of our lives. Only then, can we get the medicine, the treatment or the surgery that our souls need in order to live in Christ.

Catholic Girl Journey

One Step on the Journey

Image at Nashville CathedralIt was a very special occasion. Besides his attire, he looked no different than you or I. But he has been marked by God. As for me, it was all chance (or God’s design) that I happen to be there. If it hadn’t been for the announcement prior to the celebration, I would have never known.

Work had brought me to Tennessee, so I extended my trip to see a bit of Nashville, scheduling in Mass at the Cathedral of the Incarnation. I was excited to see what would be different. That’s one of the fun things about going to Mass when traveling, each church does things just a bit differently. Sometimes it’s the music and sometimes it’s the way you’re greeted or a special prayer that is said before Mass starts. I had no idea it would be such a special celebration. It was the first Sunday Mass of Father Andrew Bulso and only  the second in his ministry. He had been ordained just the Friday before.

Beautiful. Both the Mass and cathedral. I think what amazed me most, is that just three days prior, Fr. Bulso did not possess the ability that he had that day, to say Mass and to consecrate bread and wine into the Most Precious Body and Blood of Jesus. Through the imposition of hands and the anointing by the bishop, Fr. Bulso had become a priest marked by God. The priesthood is a gift Jesus gave the Church to continue His mission of bringing the kingdom of God to us. Although it was not my parish, it reminded me that tomorrow’s priests come from our church family of today. We may not know who they will be, but they are among us.

Holy Orders confers an indelible mark on the soul; it cannot be seen, but it changes the individual. While the preparation for the ordination does take years of study, it is a moment in time that changes the person. Much like the Last Supper for the Apostles, the time spent learning at the feet of Jesus prepared them for that night when He instituted both the Eucharist and Holy Orders. Jesus gave his priests  the ability to feed His Church, both in Word and deed. It continues down to our day, as each bishop ordains the priests, who may one day become bishops and repeat the process.

There are men in our parishes and dioceses who are called to this most unique vocation. So say a prayer they will be open to God’s call. Say a prayer for those who have answered and are in formation for the priesthood. And say a prayer of thanksgiving for priests  who celebrate Mass, from their first to their 20,000th and beyond; for each one is just one step on the journey of faith.

Catholic Girl Journey

Going the Distance

It’s summer now and I as I was walking on a trail by my home, I was thinking of the apostles and the disciples who walked the Roman roads to spread the Kingdom of God. Now the trail that I was on, was a former railroad that has been paved over with nice, smooth asphalt. The Roman roads, however were engineered with stones. While they may have tried to make them as flat as possible, I’m sure all the people, carts and animals that used those roads made for less than a flat walking surface.

It’s over 1,000 miles from Jerusalem, Israel to Rome, Italy. That’s a lot of miles! Now some of the journey could have been by sea as well. We know that Peter and Paul were both martyred in Rome, so they made that journey. Peter also did a lot of traveling with Jesus, from the Sea of Galilee to Jerusalem and around the surrounding countryside. Their journey of faith was both a spiritual and a literal journey. They went to places where they did not know people and tried to share the Word of God with them. In some places they were welcomed and received well, other places they may have been harassed or even threatened with death. Yet they still kept going.

Countryside in Israel

Countryside in Israel

I made the mistake of using my hiking sandals for my first walk of the season on the trail. As my feet started complaining about the walking, I wondered about the apostles and disciples. How many pair of sandals did they go through? Or did they even wear any type of footwear at all  when walking? While I’m proud of the two and a half mile walk that I made, at least I was able to come home and rest. For them, reaching the destination was just the beginning. The real effort was teaching about Jesus.

So the next time you’re out walking/hiking/biking in the wonderful summer weather, remember those first Christians and say a prayer of thanksgiving for all the miles they logged. Then ask yourself, how far would I travel for Jesus?

Catholic Girl Journey

The Grace of Confession

Once as a child, I was sick on my birthday. Cards that were sent from my extended family were brought to me, and one unopened one got mixed with the empty envelopes. It was discovered only as they were being torn in two before being thrown away. I was very happy that it was noticed, as it contained a five-dollar bill. While five dollars might not mean as much now, to a young child many years ago, I was upset that it could have been trashed.

The sacrament of confession is a lot like those birthday cards, it is the delivery method of something special, the grace of God. I think that gets forgotten by many Catholics. Often they go before Christmas and Easter because they think that’s when they are supposed to go. Maybe they don’t go at all if it’s not convenient. But that’s just like throwing the gift of God’s grace away.

No one is perfect, God knows that, so he gave us the wonderful sacrament of healing. Confession is work; one must prepare by examining all they have thought, said, done, or failed to do. But the fruit of that labor is not just to apologize to God and ask for His forgiveness, but to seek to avoid those sins that are confessed. It can be frustrating to confess the same sin time after time, but each time we receive the grace to help avoid that sin either for a longer time or lessen the impact when we do commit it. While it may seem that we’re not making progress, we are actually being “spiritually strengthened” (Catechism of the Catholic Church 1496) and should take comfort and peace that we have been reconciled with God and the Church.

In my parish, there is a priest available each week, however according to the Catechism, priests  “must make themselves available to celebrate this sacrament each time Christians reasonably ask for it” (CCC 1464). While confession is needed for someone who has committed a mortal sin in order to participate in the other sacraments, the graces are available to all as often as they celebrate this sacrament. And to be healed by God is something to celebrate!

Catholic Girl Journey

Glory Be to God

I was once asked what my favorite prayer was. I had to think about it, but my answer ended up: The Glory Be. Some may think it’s because it is so short. Others may think it’s because it provides the opportunity to both praise and ponder the Glory and Eternity of God. But really, I like it  because it gives praise to God as Trinity: Father, Son and Spirit.

The Trinity is one of those mysteries of the Catholic faith that we humans can never fully understand with our finite brains. I think most of us have an idea about it that makes sense to us, either that or we just don’t think about it much. While I am no different than others in my lack of true understanding, what I can appreciate is God is one in three persons.  The Catechism tells us that the divine persons do not share the one divinity among themselves but each of them is God whole and entire.

Prayer is a conversation with God, so when you pray, who do you talk to? Do you pray to God the Father? Praying the Our Father is exactly that. How about praying to His Son, Jesus? Well if you hear the priest at Mass, most prayers are “through Jesus Christ,” and are offered on your behalf, so it’s as  if you said it yourself. But how about the Holy Spirit? While there are a few prayers out there for the Holy Spirit, the Spirit is not invoked as often in prayer.That is why I like the Glory Be, because it does include the Holy Spirit.

I like to use the comparison of speaking to another person. If you know someone who is a fan of a certain sports team, even if you don’t like the sport or the team, you would still inquire about that interest, because it’s important to that person. It’s the same way with God.  Sure, you can focus your attention on one of the Persons of the Trinity, but wouldn’t the relationship go deeper if you recognized all of the Persons?

The Glory Be is so simple, but it speaks volumes. It praises God in all 3 Persons and acknowledges this glory across time: in the beginning, now and evermore. How amazing is it, that we can pray these words and express what remains a mystery to us.