faith journey

Catholic Girl Journey

Going the Distance

It’s summer now and I as I was walking on a trail by my home, I was thinking of the apostles and the disciples who walked the Roman roads to spread the Kingdom of God. Now the trail that I was on, was a former railroad that has been paved over with nice, smooth asphalt. The Roman roads, however were engineered with stones. While they may have tried to make them as flat as possible, I’m sure all the people, carts and animals that used those roads made for less than a flat walking surface.

It’s over 1,000 miles from Jerusalem, Israel to Rome, Italy. That’s a lot of miles! Now some of the journey could have been by sea as well. We know that Peter and Paul were both martyred in Rome, so they made that journey. Peter also did a lot of traveling with Jesus, from the Sea of Galilee to Jerusalem and around the surrounding countryside. Their journey of faith was both a spiritual and a literal journey. They went to places where they did not know people and tried to share the Word of God with them. In some places they were welcomed and received well, other places they may have been harassed or even threatened with death. Yet they still kept going.

Countryside in Israel

Countryside in Israel

I made the mistake of using my hiking sandals for my first walk of the season on the trail. As my feet started complaining about the walking, I wondered about the apostles and disciples. How many pair of sandals did they go through? Or did they even wear any type of footwear at all  when walking? While I’m proud of the two and a half mile walk that I made, at least I was able to come home and rest. For them, reaching the destination was just the beginning. The real effort was teaching about Jesus.

So the next time you’re out walking/hiking/biking in the wonderful summer weather, remember those first Christians and say a prayer of thanksgiving for all the miles they logged. Then ask yourself, how far would I travel for Jesus?

Catholic Girl Journey

Standing for Faith

Be bold. Be Catholic.® That is the motto at Dynamic Catholic, a lay organization whose mission is to re-evangelize Catholics in their faith. I’ve often wondered what that could entail, as I am a very shy person and talking about my faith to strangers does not come easily. However, to be a bold Catholic does not mean you need to preach on the street corners, but rather to be bold enough to stand up for the faith in the every day.

I was at dinner with colleagues from work and the conversation turned toward our education. When I mentioned that I had 16 years of Catholic schooling, one colleague said he could commiserate and that he was “recovering” as well. Quite honestly I was shocked and somehow my response was, “I’m not recovering from anything. My education has made me the person I am; I’m happy to be a Catholic.” I don’t know if he was joking or or trying to be funny, but it was then that I realized how important it is to stand up for the faith. It’s one thing to make a joke about the exercise one gets participating in a Mass with all the standing/sitting/kneeling. It’s quite another to compare Catholic education to a bad habit that one needs to learn how to overcome.

In Luke 5:9-11. Jesus calls the first disciples, Simon Peter and Andrew, by telling them, “Do not be afraid; henceforth you will be catching men.” When we are faced with awkward situations, we need to lean on the Holy Spirit, as the first disciples did when standing strong for the faith. We do not know how the Holy Spirit could use our witness to the spiritual betterment of another. It’s not our job to convert someone, but our job to be a faithful witness to allow for the conversion. It could be as simple as blessing oneself before a meal in a restaurant. It could be objecting to the use of Jesus Christ as a profanity alternative. Or it could be taking pride in the Catholic faith you confess. Others won’t learn to respect the Catholic faith unless we Catholics demonstrate our respect  first. And that is what is standing up for the faith is all about.

Catholic Girl Journey

Walking with Mary

I’ve heard that saying the rosary is like presenting a bouquet of roses to the Blessed Virgin Mary. For me, though, it is a walk through Mary’s life with Jesus.

The Rosary may sound simple enough with the main prayers consisting of the Our Father, ten Hail Marys and the Glory Be over 5 decades or repetitions. But the gold of the rosary is the mysteries that are pondered during each of those decades. There are 4 different sets of mysteries that present Jesus’ life.

The Joyful mysteries start at the beginning of Jesus’ earthly life. In fact, it could not start any earlier than His conception in Mary’s womb. The first joyful mystery is the annunciation of the angel Gabriel to Mary, where she consents to be the Mother of God and conceives Jesus. The second joyful mystery sounds like it’s all about Mary visiting Elizabeth, but one only needs to read Luke 1:39-56 to see the impact of the presence of Jesus on both Elizabeth and her unborn son. The third and fourth joyful mysteries present the nativity of Jesus and His presentation in the Temple. The fifth joyful mystery is one of my favorites, the finding of Jesus in the Temple. At age 12 Jesus is “left behind” while His parents, thinking He is part of the caravan, start the return to Nazareth. For me it is a reminder that whenever I feel far away from God, He is as close as the nearest Church.

After walking with Mary during the formative years of Jesus, the Luminous mysteries walk with both Mary and Jesus through his ministry: the baptism of Jesus in the Jordan, the wedding feast of Cana, the proclamation of the Kingdom of God, the transfiguration on Mount Tabor and the Institution of the Holy Eucharist. While Mary may only be explicitly mentioned in the gospel  for the wedding feast at Cana (John 2:1-11), I’m sure she was as close as she could be for these and all the other events of Jesus’ life.

The sorrowful mysteries walk us through the painful events leading up to and including the death of Jesus. Beginning with the agony of the garden, then the scourging at the pillar, the crowning with thorns and the carrying of the cross, praying the Hail Mary while contemplating these mysteries can help us have compassion for Jesus and more fully explore what Jesus went through to save us from our sins. I don’t think most people want to dwell on these sorrowful events, however praying these mysteries, or walking through them with Mary will help us to the fifth mystery, the crucifixion. To pray the fifth sorrowful mystery, is like standing with Mary at the foot of the cross. It is only through Mary’s strength that we can pray with her.

The glorious mysteries of the resurrection and the ascension round out the earthly life of Jesus. Yet the descent of the Holy Spirit was Jesus’ promise to the disciples and Mary was there (Acts 1:14). The fourth and fifth mysteries seem to be about Mary: the assumption of Mary into heaven and the coronation of Mary as Queen of Heaven and Earth. However, she is assumed into heaven, that is by the power and will of God, not by her own power.  God brings her body and soul into Heaven. Nor does Mary crown herself, but it is the Trinity that confers this honor to Mary.

Each set of mysteries provides much to contemplate during prayer. Saying just one set of mysteries a day recalls just a portion of Jesus’ life. But with Mary as our guide, we can come closer to her Son and appreciate all He has done for us. It is truly a walk of life.

Catholic Girl Journey

The Grace of Confession

Once as a child, I was sick on my birthday. Cards that were sent from my extended family were brought to me, and one unopened one got mixed with the empty envelopes. It was discovered only as they were being torn in two before being thrown away. I was very happy that it was noticed, as it contained a five-dollar bill. While five dollars might not mean as much now, to a young child many years ago, I was upset that it could have been trashed.

The sacrament of confession is a lot like those birthday cards, it is the delivery method of something special, the grace of God. I think that gets forgotten by many Catholics. Often they go before Christmas and Easter because they think that’s when they are supposed to go. Maybe they don’t go at all if it’s not convenient. But that’s just like throwing the gift of God’s grace away.

No one is perfect, God knows that, so he gave us the wonderful sacrament of healing. Confession is work; one must prepare by examining all they have thought, said, done, or failed to do. But the fruit of that labor is not just to apologize to God and ask for His forgiveness, but to seek to avoid those sins that are confessed. It can be frustrating to confess the same sin time after time, but each time we receive the grace to help avoid that sin either for a longer time or lessen the impact when we do commit it. While it may seem that we’re not making progress, we are actually being “spiritually strengthened” (Catechism of the Catholic Church 1496) and should take comfort and peace that we have been reconciled with God and the Church.

In my parish, there is a priest available each week, however according to the Catechism, priests  “must make themselves available to celebrate this sacrament each time Christians reasonably ask for it” (CCC 1464). While confession is needed for someone who has committed a mortal sin in order to participate in the other sacraments, the graces are available to all as often as they celebrate this sacrament. And to be healed by God is something to celebrate!

Catholic Girl Journey

Are You Mary or Martha?

I must admit, when faced with the question of whom I am the most like, I have to say I feel I’m more like Martha.

In this age of self-help and you can do anything you want to do, it is very easy to fall into the lure of control. While I know I can’t control everything, I do have a tendency to want things to go a certain way. It’s more than making choices, but trying to making the choices that will lead to what I want. As one who enjoys cooking and baking, I can sympathize when Martha asks Jesus to make Mary help her out (Lk 10:40). After all, she wants things to be just right for Him. Wouldn’t Jesus have asked Mary to help Martha if it was His will, even without Martha asking? I don’t think Martha realized than she was ordering God to do something for her so that her will might be done. How often have I prayed for things of that nature? Oh, just every time I go on a long trip, it’s: “God please see me safely there without incident.” While I don’t think anyone would actually pray for something to go wrong, I think the prayer should be modified to include, “as long as it is Your will.”

For Mary,  the food prep and serving would  always be there, but  she must have known that Jesus would not. Instead of being anxious about tasks, she sat  at Jesus’ feet and listened. Anxiety is the fear of not being in control. How can I be more like Mary and less anxious about things? By sitting at the feet of Jesus and giving over my concerns to Him and, most importantly, listening. I do try to turn things over to God, but then I start to wonder how situations will play out, or how I should prepare myself, and the old anxiety creeps in. It is important to recognize that and to always try. I know Jesus will always be there for me and with me in every situation.

How much more can my life be stress free if I turn everything over to Jesus? It doesn’t mean not planning things, otherwise nothing would get done. It’s more about planning and then turning the actual events/situations over to Jesus to watch over and guide me when the unexpected occurs. Sometimes it’s in the detours of life that the greatest blessings come.

Catholic Girl Journey

A welcome distraction?

Cars whizzing by, chirping birds and buzzing cell phones are just some examples of noisy distractions in our everyday lives. When you’re trying to quiet yourself to pray, those sounds seem like they are ten times louder.

I’m lucky enough to have an adoration chapel at my parish, but even in there, a cough, a clearing of the throat or the sound of turning pages in a prayer book feel like a conspiracy to prevent me connecting with God. One would expect that at Mass it would be easier, right? Not so, and in addition to the noises is added the antics of little children.

It’s at those moments that I recall my college Native American literature class. Not only did we read the stories, but we also learned a bit about the culture. One of the tribes from the central plains would allow the children to be, let’s say, mischievous during certain religious ceremonies. They were allowed to pinch people, sprinkle them with water and pranks of that sort without repercussion. The theory was that the adults would learn how to concentrate more on the ceremony and less on what was going on around them. I wonder if God is allowing those distractions for me to practice paying attention to Him. If I can’t put aside the distractions at Mass, how can I listen for Him in the everyday distractions?

Another thought that comes to mind is when Elijah was waiting for the Lord to speak to him (1 Kings 19:11-13). God was not in the strong wind, the earthquake or the fire, but rather in a tiny whispering sound. Perhaps God is speaking in what I’m calling a distraction and I’m not paying attention. Maybe that cell phone going off in the middle of Mass is a reminder for me to pay closer attention to what is going on instead of letting my mind wander. The crying child could be a reminder of the tears Jesus shed for me and that I need to be more open to His will for me. And the next time I feel distracted, I can use the distraction as an opportunity to ask Jesus to help me focus on Him.

Catholic Girl Journey

Following The Way

During this Easter season, one thing I marvel about is the first Christians.  Before they were called Christians, they followed  what was known as The Way (Acts 9:2).

The first reading during this time between Easter and Pentecost is generally taken from the the New Testament, mostly from the Acts of the Apostles which illustrate for us the first bloom of the Church. I feel so blessed that we have over 2,000 years of history, reflection and interpretation to help us understand just a bit of what Easter is all about: the Eucharist, Passion, Death and Resurrection of Jesus. Even as a cradle-Catholic, I often feel overwhelmed pondering this. In Acts, Peter reminds the crowd of their participation in the death of Jesus (Acts 2:22-24; 3:12-26). What must have it been like to hear those words from Peter and know that you were one who watched or shouted out, “Crucify Him”? Perhaps because most of the apostles and disciples “ran away” from Jesus during the time of the crucifixion, they could minister to those who participated in calling for His death. Maybe seeing the conviction and zealousness of the apostles moved the people to accept God’s mercy. Maybe seeing what God’s mercy had brought about in the apostles helped them to be baptized and follow the way of Christ.

One of the repeating themes in Acts is the persecution the disciples suffered  for preaching about Jesus as the Christ. Time and again they meet with individuals who try to stop them. The apostles’ response, though, is much different than most would expect: they delight in the suffering (Acts 5:41). How can anyone delight in being taunted, beaten and killed for Jesus? And yet, from the beginning it was so. Sadly, the persecution continues into our own time. While, we may not face death in America, how many times do Christians suffer persecution in the way of bad jokes, put-downs and being called foolish for their beliefs?

What did those first converts see in The Way? Risking life as they knew it, they found something much more beautiful that was worth the sacrifice. I may not know what convinced them to follow Jesus’ teachings, but I appreciate their convictions, sufferings and triumphs as fellow brothers and sisters in the family of Jesus Christ. Where would we be without the witness of those who knew Jesus and received his teaching directly?

Catholic Girl Journey

Questions and Answers

“God answers all prayers. Sometimes He says ‘Yes’, sometimes He says ‘No’, and sometimes He says ‘You’ve got to be kidding…’”.

I have a mug with that saying on it, and it reminds me that God does have a sense of humor. I think of times in my life when I’ve prayed for help about something that could be considered trivial, but in my world, it was a mountain. And I have on occasion tried to imagine what God’s response would be. Would He say, “Why are you asking for that when there are so many more important things that you could ask for?” Or perhaps “Why is that the most important thing to you?” It’s a good thing that God is who He is, as He would need the patience of a saint to put up with my requests. God knows what we need and will provide it when we actually need it. Prayer is a conversation with Him, it helps us get to know Him better.  Prayer deepens our relationship with God;  we adore Him,  we express contrition for our misdeeds, we give thanks for the gifts we received and we ask for assistance and graces.

But what about when God asks something of us? What is  our response? For me there are times when the saying on the mug could just as easily be my response to God: You’ve got to be kidding! It reminds me of the parable of the two sons, where one responded ‘No’ but then went, while the other responded ‘Yes’ but did  not go (Mt 21:28-31). Sometimes I think my response is, ‘God, I don’t want to do this, but You’re asking me and that’s the only reason I’m doing it.’ It’s easy to see this as an acceptable answer because at least we are doing His will. Looking at it from one perspective, yes, that is true. However, it rather falls short, like a child who stomps off to clean her room. Like any relationship, my relationship with God is a two-way street and I need to be open to God’s will, especially when He asks me to go outside of my comfort zone. It’s not easy, but His grace can see me through when I say ‘Yes’ joyfully. And isn’t His grace the greatest blessing of all?

Catholic Girl Journey

Debunking the Faith Myth

People of strong faith always seem so confident. Why don’t I feel that way?

I was pondering that thought while driving one day and and odd reference popped into my head: ducks. I remembered seeing some ducks while kayaking; they look so calm and serene, but you know underneath the water they are paddling like mad.

Life will always have challenges, whether they are the kind that we take on ourselves or ones that are thrust upon us. Practicing our faith does not make these challenges much easier and it certainly does not take them away. But faith can provide perspective to the challenge. It helps us take a step back to  reflect, “What does God want me to learn from this?” Faith provides  the opportunity to ask God to help us through the challenge and asking for God’s help can bring a sense of peace.  In private, we may be praying fervently for our challenges, but to the world we can present the calm serenity of the duck gliding across the water.

You know that God loves you. You know God will always help you. And yet, the challenge can still create a feeling void. Even with prayer, there may seem like there is no answer to the challenge.  Sometimes we need to let go of the “non-feeling” and just trust in God. Tell Him you believe in his plan for your life. Continue to work on meeting the challenge on your part. Continue to ask for God’s help. Keep paddling forward.

Ironically, as I was pondering  this post while driving, it started raining; actually pouring is more like it. At first I thought maybe God doesn’t like this idea. But the rain started just as I reached the point in my drive home where I was really familiar with the road. And I got mostly green lights. So then I thought maybe I’m on the right track. I may not feel confident with this challenge of writing posts, but maybe I need to keep paddling forward.

Catholic Girl Journey

Believe

Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity … all in one, little, white wafer. This is what I believe.

As a Catholic, one of the most important beliefs is the real presence of Jesus in the consecrated host. He is truly present in both his human and divine natures. There are lots of books that can describe the belief in much greater detail, but no matter how much one learns about it, the one question remains. Do you believe?

As a college student I took a class called “Jesus: History or Myth,” and it was my first real experience where I had to ask myself what I believed. Hearing other students scoff at the notion of Jesus was shocking for a girl who spent 12 years in Catholic education. But almost more troubling were those who believed Jesus as a prophet or some sort of great person, but not as the Son of God. It was during those college years that I first began to own what I had learned as a child—Jesus is the Son of God, the Savior who died for our sins and rose again.

At Easter, we celebrate the three events that make the real presence of Jesus possible: the Last Supper, Good Friday and the Resurrection. When Jesus took the bread, blessed it, broke it and gave it to His disciples to eat, He asked them to repeat those actions (Lk 22:19). But they would have had little meaning if He continued amongst them as He was. Those actions would have been a memorial if Jesus had only died on the cross. But Jesus rose from the dead, transforming the meaning of those actions into the bread of life. In a way, Jesus at the Last Supper took what He was going to do in the future and brought it to the disciples in that moment. At every consecration of the Eucharist since then, both the crucified and resurrected Jesus are present. Jesus, the Son of God, is the master of all time and space. How can I not trust Him to be able to perform such a miracle? Each day that miracle occurs at each Mass all around the world.

I cannot claim that I understand how it is possible. It is a mystery and defies logic. But that is what faith is about. It is believing that God so loves me, that He wants to very much be a part of me, so that by consuming the consecrated host, we are one. No, it does not make me divine, but it does bring me closer to God. It opens me up to trust in Him more each time I receive. But first, I have to believe.

Note: While this was written only speaking about the bread, the same is true for the wine at consecration. Each is considered to be fully Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity of Jesus.