Temptation

By Sunday, all I wanted to do was become one with the recliner and take it easy. Thanksgiving week was wonderful, but very busy with much preparation and it had left me tired. The oddest thought struck me… that I should stay home, curl up in my chair and nap. But I needed to get to Mass, after all, it is my Sunday obligation.

Skipping Mass is not an idea I wanted to entertain. But with every thought of how comfy the easy chair was, came the whisper that it would be okay if I just missed it this once. ‘I don’t want to think that way!’ I kept telling myself. The thought of missing Mass seemed absurd, so why did it keep coming into my head? Why did it feel that my limbs weighed a 100 pounds each when I tried to get myself ready? It seemed the more I pushed away the thought, the stronger and harder it came and the harder it was for me to get ready.

Temptations come in all sorts of sizes, styles and timings. They come to us not when we are strong, but when we are weak. They come under the cloak of logic, they seem like they are the correct choice to make. Even if we say ‘no’ at first, they keep reminding us of what we want instead of what God wants, which entices us to think about them and consider the possibility. Sometimes we can identify them for what they are: temptations. But it doesn’t always make it any easier to combat. But the temptation itself is not a sin, nor is the battle; it is only when we choose to give into the temptation does it win over us.

I did manage to make it to Mass just as the entrance hymn was being sung. I wish I could have been more timely, but at least I didn’t give up. I kept battling myself to keep moving until I got myself to Church. But it was not my victory, it was Jesus’, as He gave me the grace to succeed, as long as I persevered. While this was just a skirmish in the big picture of my life, it all adds up. Seeing how it played out gave me the opportunity to affirm to God that I believe in Him and that He will see me through. And my nap in the recliner was much more restful and peaceful after I came home from Mass.

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