Jesus Christ

Catholic Girl Journey

Instant change

I was preparing to lector for a daily Mass, and the reading happened to be Paul’s conversion (Acts 9:1-20). Part of my preparation is to read out loud, and hearing this powerful passage made me take a closer look.

The writer of Acts does not shy away from bold statements, and the chapter begins, “Now Saul, still breathing murderous threats against the disciples of the Lord…” It’s clear that Saul doesn’t just dislike the disciples; he wants to put an end to this group known as The Way, even if it means killing all the followers of Jesus. However, the official letters he requested from the high priest were not for putting them to death, rather that, “he might bring them back to Jerusalem in chains.” Perhaps he had hoped that these followers could be reconditioned or convinced to return to the proper Jewish practices. Perhaps it’s this passion, this zealousness for God, that makes room in his heart for conversion.

Saul’s encounter with Jesus came in a blinding flash of light that caused him to close his eyes and fall to the ground. In this vulnerable state, Jesus spoke to him: “Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?” The encounter leaves him blind, requiring his fellow travelers to lead him by the hand into Damascus. For three days, he was left in prayer, he neither ate nor drank. What must have gone through his mind during this time? There was probably a good amount of ‘what have I done’ during his meditation. But perhaps all the exposure to the disciples’ teaching started to sink in, including the debates Stephen participated in prior to his martyrdom which Saul witnessed. Is there a deliberate connection between the three days that Jesus spent in the tomb and this three day hiatus in Saul’s life? When he was baptized, Saul’s old life was washed away and new life in Jesus’ resurrection took root, so that “he began at once to proclaim Jesus in the synagogues, that he is the Son of God.”

Reading the twenty lines of this major transformation makes it seem like it happened in an instant. But it took Saul three days of being blind, praying, fasting to prepare for this baptism and his new life for Christ. He went from being the persecutor to being the persecuted. The results are the fourteen letters he wrote to the Christian communities, timeless messages that continue to be relevant to Jesus’ followers even today.

Catholic Girl Journey

The crown of Jesus

While meditating on the Passion of Jesus is never easy it is the third sorrowful mystery, the crowning with thorns, that I find the hardest to comprehend.

Both Matthew (27:27-31) and John (19:1-3) mention the crowning with thorns, but it was just one part of the violence against Jesus. The soldiers spat at Him, slapped Him and mocked His kingship. And Jesus allowed their actions.

To the soldiers, He was just another man who called himself a king. They were in a foreign country as unwelcome visitors. No doubt they had experienced a time or two when a person of a higher rank insulted or shamed them. So the soldiers took it out on their prisoners, especially Jesus, the so-called King of the Jews.

But with all that Jesus had to suffer: the agony of the garden, the betrayals by his friends Judas and Peter, the accusations of the Pharisees, as well as the crucifixion and death, why was this additional insult necessary?

Perhaps this irony of a crown of thorns is to help us reflect on how we treat Jesus as the king in our lives. Do we accept His rule willingly with all it entails? Do we trust that Jesus is working in our lives when we don’t see or feel it? Or do we worry and plan so that we can maintain control?  How many times have our actions been like the soldiers actions to Jesus, mockingly proclaiming Him as king? Or how many times do our sins like those thorns cause pain for Jesus?

Like the prodigal son, let us demonstrate our sincere sorrow for those times when we did not treat Jesus as a king. Let us seek Him in the Divine Mercy chaplet, praying “with great confidence to submit ourselves to Your holy will, which is Love and Mercy itself.”

 

Note: Novena to Divine Mercy begins on Good Friday, in preparation of the Feast of Divine Mercy on April 2nd.

Catholic Girl Journey

The journey of Christmas

Christmas is all about journeys. It starts out when Mary makes haste to visit Elizabeth. Then Mary and Joseph make their way to Bethlehem. The shepherds trek from the fields to the manger and the magi leave their far-off homes under the guidance of a star. What unites them all is that each  is a journey in faith.

Mary is greeted by Elizabeth with the title of ‘Mother of my Lord.’ Mary responds with her servant song. It’s the first of many journeys she will take with Jesus as he grows into a man.  These journeys all lead in one direction: to the cross, the tomb and ultimately to rising from the dead so as to pave the way to heaven for all of us.  Mary’s role is that of simply serving.

Joseph’s faith allows him to believe in his dream and to take his wife into his home and provide for her and for the child he knows is not his. He, along with Mary, will receive other visitors in Bethlehem. He will protect his family, leading them into Egypt until the threat to the child has passed.

The shepherds are awestruck as the angel makes his announcement. “Do not be afraid,” they are told. Whether it is fear of the angels or the curiosity of the message, they seek out the child in a manger. Their simple faith is rewarded when they find the baby Jesus, just as they were told, and respond by praising God.

The magi’s journey took them to a different country following a star. In the world around them, they noticed the changes in the night sky. Determining it meant the birth of a new king, they took it upon themselves to travel a long way to welcome the future ruler into the world. Their faith is rewarded when they find the child with Mary and pay Him homage.

Each journey is different. Each encounter with God is different. We cannot compare one with another, nor should we.  Each journey is important in its own way. Not all can be Mary or Joseph, but that does not mean their mission is any less meaningful. It’s when these stories are presented together as a whole that we see a marvelous picture emerging. The whole of humanity  is represented welcoming Christ into the world.  His journey on earth was just beginning in the Christmas story, but the story continues when each of us lays down our life to seek Jesus, adding our faith journey to all these others.   

Catholic Girl Journey

Walking on Water

St. Peter has become an important role model for me. You can see his journey of faith through the Gospels and Acts: from a sinner fisherman to the bold leader of the apostles.

My favorite passage is the one where Peter tries to walk to Jesus on the water (Matthew 14:22-33). So many focus on the fact that Peter had to cry out for Jesus when he began to sink.  “You of little faith,” Jesus said,” why did you doubt?” I’m not one to argue with God, but I like to look at the boldness of Peter. He asked Jesus to command him to walk on the water, then Peter actually got out of the boat! So let’s just stop a minute and think about this. The wind is blowing strongly, the water is thrashing about and the boat is rocking enough to make seasoned fishermen fear for their lives. Would YOU step out on the water?

Peter not only stepped out of the boat, but he started to walk to Jesus. Walking on water! How fantastic and frightening that must have been. But Peter starts to sink. Why? Did he realize what he was doing? Did his focus shift from walking to Jesus to realizing that this was a miracle? Did he recognize his sinfulness in the midst of what Jesus was allowing him to do?  Did he focus on the storm instead of on Jesus?There can be a lot of suppositions about this, but the most important thing was that he called out for help, not to the others in the boat where there were probably ropes and oars that could help in a material sense. He called out to Jesus – not just for help but to be saved.

I’ve walked on water twice, but it was frozen–once on the frozen Arctic Ocean and once on a glacier during a helicopter excursion. The experience is very surreal in a world of white ice and snow. But the water was firm and solid, nothing that would make me think there would be any movement. If I were in the same situation as Peter, I think my reaction might be to cling to whatever piece of wood that I could, craving that stability of earth. But Jesus does not want us to cling to what we know, he calls us to walk to Him, to walk on the water to Him. Our daily lives might not require walking on actual water, but sometimes it can be a metaphor for the challenges in our lives. How many times do we step out of the boat in faith? How many times do we have the courage to walk on the water toward Jesus? How many times do we call out for Him to save us? Andt how many times do we doubt that He can? Jesus, I believe in You; help my unbelief!

Hide me, Jesus

Within your wounds hide me. It’s a powerful phrase from the Anima Christi prayer. I never gave it much thought until I found myself saying that line as a prayer itself.

I fully admit that I am not perfect and need the sacrament of confession just as much as any other person. When I think about the wounds that Jesus suffered, I think about how my thoughts/words/actions or lack thereof, were a cause to those injuries. Jesus took on all sin (past, present and future) during his passion and death. So how can I, who helped cause those injuries, now ask to be hidden in them?

The wounds of Jesus do not go away after the resurrection, otherwise Thomas would not have been able to probe them. But somehow those wounds cease to be of pain because Jesus transformed them in His resurrection. He has taken His broken body and made it beautiful in His divinity.

Asking Jesus to hide me in His transformed wounds is asking Him to take my own broken sinfulness and transform it into something beautiful, to use it for God’s will. Often I get stuck in wanting to overcome and perfect myself for God; I forget I need His help. And sometimes His help is to allow me to make the wrong decision so that I can learn from it. Frustration often surfaces when I don’t seem to be improving. But even Jesus fell three times while carrying His cross, so how can I expect to perfect myself after just one fall?

Hiding in Jesus’ wounds means that I need to be very, very close to Him. One way of doing that is to let Him come into the less than perfect parts of me. He knows who I am and what my struggles are. He struggled and suffered as a man and I know He wants to help me in my struggles. What an amazing opportunity I have to get closer to Jesus by allowing Him to help me when I really need it.