relationship with God

Catholic Girl Journey Logo

To fear or not to fear

To fear or not to fear, that is the question. But what is fear? Is it simply a reaction that we have no control over? And if we are told not to fear, how can we adjust, if it is merely an instinctual response?

This past Sunday’s Gospel narrates the Transfiguration of Jesus in the presence of Peter, James, and John. Jesus’ appearance becomes dazzlingly brillant, He is speaking with two prophets who were from previous generations, and if that was not enough, the three disciples hear the voice of God the Father from a cloud. That’s a whole lot of stimulation packed into a short amount of time! Their senses must have been on overload! I would hazard a guess that if they were transported to this time to see how much civilization has changed, it would still pale in comparison and wonder to the Transfiguration. Their reaction was to be as humble as possible, down on the ground, most likely with their eyes closed. But Jesus taps them on the shoulder and says, “…do not be afraid.” (Mt 17:1-9)

Throughout the Bible, from Genesis to Revelation, there are countless instances of the phrase, “Do not be afraid.” Yet, according to the Catechism of the Catholic Church, one of the gifts of the Holy Spirit is Fear of the Lord. (CCC 1831) So if fear is a gift, why are so many instructed not to be fearful? Is there a difference between fear of the Lord and being afraid? 

Fear is the human response to danger or threat and perhaps part of fear is that something could surprise us or catch us off-guard. Another aspect of fear could be that something is outside of our control. Is it any wonder then, that an interaction with the Divine — the only one who can completely remove our existence, even to our soul — would be cause for fear? You can’t run from God, He’s everywhere. It is by His love, care, and concern that we are alive today and have immortal souls that will be with Him after our earthly life is completed. Yet we are more of a danger to ourselves than God is to us! Our choices and resulting actions can lead us away from a relationship with God, which is truly the most lonely place to be.

The gift of Fear of the Lord by the Lord Himself, through the third person in the Trinity, is not meant to invoke the sense of danger or harm. Rather, it’s more about the ability to have a humble response, as the Apostles did, when we experience God in our life. For example, when we see a newborn baby wiggling ten tiny fingers and toes, it’s hard not to be overwhelmed by seeing the miracle of new life; a life that is in the image and likeness of God. Depending on the relationship with the child, one may have a sense of joy, wonder, responsibility, worry, and perhaps it’s a combination of all those. With the Holy Spirit’s gift, we can transform the variety of feelings into a thankful prayer of praise offered to God. 

Fear of the Lord is not to cower and bemoan our inability to control what happens to us, but rather the ability to put everything we have into the hands of God, trusting in His ways and His timings. It is not a feeling or instinct, but a chosen reaction to be humble and thankful to God, most especially when we see the results of His handiwork in the world and in our lives. 

Catholic Girl Journey Logo

The humble ask

How comfortable are you in asking to borrow something from another? That was a question being discussed by the KLOVE radio DJs on Saturday morning as I drove around doing my errands.

I was fascinated to hear the various accounts, from both other listeners who called in as well as the DJs themselves. They recounted times or situations where they struggled, even arguing with their spouse about asking a neighbor if they could borrow their lawnmower. They had so many responses about how difficult it is to ask to borrow something, that they asked if anyone didn’t have difficulty, to call in. As a Christian radio station who can only stay on the air thanks to the generosity of the listeners, I’m sure most of the folks are happy to help others out in whatever way they can. It’s rather ironic that when they are in need, asking for help is harder than giving it when they have plenty.

I’m sure throughout my life I have borrowed something from someone a time or two: a pen, a book, a tool, etc., but I can’t really recall any specific circumstances.  For me, I think it would probably depend on what I was borrowing and from whom. Borrowing something from a family member is a lot easier than from a neighbor with whom you generally exchange pleasantries. However, when we ask to borrow something, there is a chance that the person could refuse us. It’s a risk we take, in asking, but it’s also a risk to those we ask. The more significant the item we’re borrowing the more risk the lender assumes when they lend the item to us. A pen is not nearly as great an issue to replace as something like a lawn mower. 

In order to borrow, we must first ask permission. I think it’s the asking that makes so many uncomfortable. To ask another to borrow something, one must ask in a humble manner. We are admitting to a need we have. We are admitting that, however small the need, we are not totally self-sufficient. Even a minor item to borrow shows a level of vulnerability that we have. No wonder people have such a hard time asking to borrow from another; who wants to admit we are lacking?!

When we ask to borrow something from another and they agree, they give us what it is we are asking. While it may be easier to ask God for something in prayer petitions, God’s response is not quite the same as our family, friends, and neighbors are to borrowing something. Instead, God gives us what we need, when we need it. Too often we pray for a specific outcome, almost like placing an order for a drive-thru pickup. Like someone seeking to borrow something of value, our requests to God may be denied and we have to be prepared for that. When we humbly ask God for some blessing, we need to be open to the unique and generous response God gives to us. It may not be what we asked for, but it will be for our eternal good. God doesn’t say, “No, go away.” Rather, His response is, “No, but I love you,” as He pours out abundant blessings in other ways upon us. 

Perhaps we are given opportunities that require us to borrow so that we can practice being humble and vulnerable. Maybe instead of focusing on how uncomfortable it is for us to ask another, we should focus on how God’s love for us is shown by the generosity of the lender.  

Catholic Girl Journey Logo

Respecting the house

The shoes were on the porch just next to the door and I smiled when I saw them. They belong to my nephew’s wife, from China, and reminded me of my Indian friend’s house, who had a large rack just inside the door to place your shoes. It’s an amazing sign of respect.

I’ve often had friends and acquaintances over who have asked about my “shoes in the house” policy. As much as I try to keep Vera from tracking litter all over the house, I find it easier to wear a pair of slip-on shoes to reduce the injury one’s foot feels when it steps on a piece of litter. They may be small, but seem like they have a million edges to them trying to find the most tender part of your foot. I leave it to my guests to decide, but greatly appreciate their inquiry. 

The removal of shoes upon entering a home, signals that a person respects the home and the people living inside it. This action communicates their proactiveness in reducing the dirt from the outside world from being tracked all over the floors inside the house. It’s more than just the house that benefits from this action. It reduces the necessity for the household to clean the floors saving the people living there time and energy. These visitors say with their actions, “I’m going to limit the impact this visit has on your workload.” What a positive way to start a visit!

But cleanliness is not the only reason to remove shoes. God commanded Moses to remove his sandals as he approached the burning bush to investigate it, citing it was holy ground. (Exodus 3:5) In society today, we are not asked to remove our shoes before we enter a church. However, we should act at all times in a respectful way while we are in the church, whether that is for the Holy Sacrifice of the Mas, or for cleaning, decorating, and maintaining the building. It is, after all, God’s house and He is dwelling there 365 days a year in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament. 

Respecting God’s house can take many forms. It can be bowing to the altar upon entering, genuflecting to the tabernacle when one passes in front of it, or speaking with hushed tones when others are present and seeking silent prayer with God. Respect does not mean having a dour expression for the entire duration you’re in the building. On the contrary, we are the closest to God we can be on this side of heaven, so even a little smile is something we can be sure to put on when entering the church. These small actions are a way for us to show our love and respect, not only for God, but for all the children He has called into His family who are there. They also serve as a reminder to us when we perform these, that God is the King of Kings and Lord of Lords and He reigns supreme. We cast our egos to the side and practice the virtue of humility. 

Perhaps the most respect we need to give is to the Holy Sacrament in both forms.  As we approach the sanctuary, literally the most holy area of the church building, are we preparing our hearts and souls for Jesus to enter? Or are we scanning the crowds for familiar faces and shifting between feet wondering why the line is taking so long? Do we humbly receive the Eucharist or snatch it out of the hands of the minister? 

Just like seeing that pair of shoes on the porch reminded me of the respect my nephew’s wife has for the family, we should take a moment to think about how we show our love and respect to God when we are in His house. We may be performing actions of respect out of habit, but how would they change if they were practiced with intention? 

Catholic Girl Journey Logo

Called to discipleship

When you hear the word “disciple” what is the first thing that comes to your mind? For me it was the men and women who followed Jesus while He was on this earth. They listened and learned from Him and perhaps even traveled with Him. In reality, all Christians are disciples of Jesus, no matter the time period.

I attended an RCIA conference recently and the presenters mentioned several times about living out our discipleship. Since my definition was stuck in the past when Jesus lived in Israel, the comments seemed to claim more attention than some of the other material. I think of myself as a Catholic Christian, but I don’t think I would describe myself as a disciple of Jesus, simply because I’ve never met Him in His human form. I firmly believe that Jesus is truly present in the Precious Body and Precious Blood after the consecration, and that His Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity are fully in each. Since I rest my faith in this mystery, considering myself a disciple who walks with Jesus should be easy. I seek Him out every time I go to Mass, whether it’s just a regular Sunday, or I’m on vacation and can find a Church that has a weekday Mass. Yet describing myself as a disciple still has an odd ring to it.

The Gospels are full of Jesus’ words and teachings. I hear them on Sundays, and the daily morning and evening prayers I pray using the Magnificat companion. It contains various readings from both Old and New Testaments, and may include Gospel passages. I am listening and learning from Jesus, so here again the description of disciple should fit me. I could try and argue that the original disciples could ask clarifying questions to Jesus and get a response, but isn’t that what contemplative prayer is all about? We’re not just supposed to babbel a bunch of words using the Our Father, Hail Mary, and Glory Be, and then go through our day as if our relationship with Jesus is limited to specific prayer times. I’ve prayed for answers and received them in a number of unique ways; is that any different from the original disciples who asked a question and received a parable in reply? 

I think the scary thing about considering myself as a disciple is that I can’t just believe in Jesus and then go do my own thing. Like the original disciples, my life must change from being focused on myself and how I fit into the culture of this age, to one of being a reflecting light of Christ, and bringing it to the dark areas where God leads me. It can be speaking up when someone uses Jesus’ name as a curse word, presenting a topic to those studying to enter into the Catholic Church, or it could be opening myself to write a blog post with a message He wants to convey. I know God has full control over my life, and yet, even just admitting to myself that I am Jesus’ disciple still seems to have repercussions that are unknown and therefore are a bit frightening. 

I do trust God with everything I am and have and He has always generously provided me with what I’ve needed. I trust in His mercy and His love for me. How can I say that I am anything else but Jesus’ disciple? Who will say it with me? I am a disciple of Jesus and I accept His calling, whatever He may ask of me. 

Catholic Girl Journey Logo

Directing Thanks

We all know the responses we say at Mass. However, have you ever thought of them, not as responses but as prayers?

For the past few weeks I’ve been contemplating the response given to the first and second readings at Mass. Thanks be to God. My initial thoughts were that it was rather flat in that it didn’t evoke any type of feeling from me. It was merely an obligatory response. Even when I put it in conjunction with the phrase that prompts it, The Word of the Lord, it still felt like a hollow response. I love language and am fascinated by the choice of words used within the Mass. My favorite is the concluding Doxology of the Eucharistic prayers and I could probably ponder that for hours due to the richness of the words and what they convey. So to participate in the Mass weekly saying the same response in the Liturgy of the Word with no feeling was making me uncomfortable and I wanted to find out why.

The Scripture readings are God’s word to the world, in every time and in every situation. These words were inspired by God and directed through human efforts yet they still convey the faith and morals God wanted to express. I do enjoy both reading and hearing the Scriptures proclaimed. I tried to think of a more powerful meaning to the phrase before the response. The Word of the Lord really does define what is read, and in trying to find something with more vigor, the only thing I could equate to it is, “God is speaking this to you.” That’s a bit overwhelming to think about, and I don’t think I would want to hear that twice every Sunday at Mass. However, that does shape my perspective of a response. What would you say to that? 

God’s Word to us is a gift. He speaks to us in both the Old and the New Testaments. When we listen to them and study them, we get to know God better. When I receive something I see as a blessing from God, anything from an easy merge onto a busy highway to a rediscovered five-dollar bill at the bottom of my purse, or even seeing me through a challenging day, I do my best to thank God for it. I use the language I would use to any other person who does something nice, “Thank you, God!” But what if I changed my language? What if, instead of the words currently used in our culture, I switch to saying “Thanks be to God”? 

I shouldn’t be surprised, but after a few weeks of using “Thanks be to God” in my prayers to God, that phrase has become vibrantly alive! I’ve realized in saying and praying it, that it is a reminder that all Thanks should Be directed To God. It underscores that everything I have is a gift from God and that I rely solely on Him. While I may continue to say “Thank you” to people in the course of everyday life, every time I do, I’m also thanking God for putting that person in that place and time to help me or share God’s gifts with me. For example, saying “thank you” to someone who holds open a door for you is also a “thank you” to God for putting that person there to see and acknowledge you and to share the gift of God’s love, even if they don’t even realize that’s what they are doing. Everyone is made in God’s image and likeness and little things that we may chalk up to “being nice” or “having manners” is a reflection of God’s love for us. 

As Catholics, we may be dismissed from Mass, but we are called to live Mass in our everyday lives. Diving deeper into just this one response has opened a treasure chest of meaning, one that prompts more reflection. Let us give thanks to God for the richness of faith and pray to always be ready to explore the faith rather than allowing it to go stale and be merely words that are spoken. 

Catholic Girl Journey Logo

Baptized into freedom

As Americans celebrate what’s considered to be the birthday of the United States on July 4, I started to think about the most important freedom we have: free from sin.

The first line of the Declaration of Independence, written 247 years ago, called upon “ Laws of Nature and of Nature’s God” as it set out to describe why this declaration was necessary. Many people are familiar with the first line of the second paragraph of the document, indicating the “unalienable Rights” given by the Creator, namely: Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness. Some will take that list and twist it around, interpreting it that they are free to do whatever they want with their lives. Yet the three principles are placed in a particular order and reading through the document illustrates why. In the over 25 objections raised against the British sovereign, many include mentions of actions that were harming the very lives of the colonists, some dealt with false incarceration, and lastly they included constraints on conducting commerce transactions. The rally cry that many now use, was a summary of the injustices of that time. The document essentially was a list of sins from which the American colonists were seeking freedom. 

Most, if not all, of the founding fathers were Christians. They had been baptized in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. They understood the ten commandments and how people who had been raised with these basic fundamentals could govern one another. In addition, they not only prohibited a particular national religion, they also allowed for the free exercise of any religion. During that time, religion was not something that enslaved men, but freed them, allowing them to pursue a government by the common people. 

While the world and many of its governments have certainly changed since those days, the opportunity to be free of sin through baptism remains. In the sacrament, we are freed from original sin and made whole in relationship with the Triune God. Jesus didn’t take away the ten commandments, as they continue to be an instruction manual of how to be human. Rather Jesus actually intensified the actions with the Beatitudes. We, who are baptized in Christ Jesus, are called to be holy and to imitate His ways. Although we were freed from original sin in baptism, the fallen world around us never ceases to throw obstacles to prevent us from living freed from all sin. Each moment, however, does give us a freedom of choice: to choose ourselves and what we want, or to choose God and what He wants. First through the Israelites and then through Jesus and the early Church, God provided the guidelines for doing His will. How many times do we hesitate to accept what is captured in Scriptures? How many times do we try to twist things around to suit our needs? 

After the celebratory barbeques and fireworks, let us take a moment to remember our baptisms and the gifts we received from God. Let us refresh our knowledge of God’s will for us by taking time to reflect on the Scriptures. Let the Holy Spirit stir a fire of true freedom in you. 

Catholic Girl Journey Logo

Less than best

We all have days that turn into a slog to get through and thus, it seems like the only hope is the promise of a new day tomorrow. The question is, do we offer these kinds of days up to God?

When I have a rough day, I know I’m not performing my best from any perspective: work, home-life, pet parent, and even to myself… not to mention spiritually. I usually have a number of things I want to accomplish during a day and when it turns out that everything is a struggle, I feel like I’m asking God for help more than I am offering up the struggles to Him. Perhaps because I can feel defeated during those times, I also feel disappointed in myself and I find that I project that sentiment as how God feels. Even though logic tells me that is not so, for God IS love and sees the bigger picture of my entire life. He does not focus on the momentary blip that we call a day. If a hard day was a cake, I would imagine it would be a sunken, half-baked one, with burned edges and missing ingredients; tasting so bad that even a dog would not eat it. How does one offer that up to God? 

I know I’m far from perfect, but on a good day, I can find so many things to be thankful to God for and gratitude seems to flow from my mouth for the simplest of things: the sun shining, Vera purring, the ability to help a coworker. I feel thankful when I vocalize these thoughts. Maybe I perceive a lack of similar intensity on bad days that makes me feel that my prayers for help, guidance, and direction are inadequate. The passage that comes to mind during these times is more about carrying the cross one is given on a daily basis (Matt 16:24) rather than God’s yoke being easy and light (Matt 11:28-30). Indeed, the language Jesus uses of a yoke is meant to convey that there are two animals pulling the proverbial cart. If we are one and He is the other, we may be taking more of the load than we should. I wonder if the reason why the weight of the yoke on these trial-filled days is because I’m trying to not only pull the cart by myself, but take it in a different direction than what God has intended. 

We are never alone, in whatever challenge we face, because God is always with us. He never left the Israelites even when they strayed from His commandments for generations. I think Paul summed it up best when in the letter to the Romans he said: “For I am sure that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present for things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Rom 8:38-39) While we should always strive to do our best, even the poorest work we perform can still be offered up to God. He knows how much we are capable of, and we need to leave all judgment to Him and try not to compete with ourselves.

No matter what our state in life, we will face challenging days. Perhaps in offering them to God as we experience them, as well as at the end of day, we can make ourselves more ready to spend eternity with God because we have shared the whole of our lives with Him. 

A heart like no other

June is a very special month. During it, for over 300 years, Catholics have been celebrating a special devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus. While the Mass for the feast occurs 19 days after Pentecost (this Friday), the whole month of June is dedicated to the contemplation and adoration of a mystery as deep as the Love that God is. 

There have been numerous saints who were devoted to the Sacred Heart, but it was St. Margaret Mary Alacoque that received the unenviable task of promulgating it throughout the Church. According to Catholic Online, “A group of theologians declared her visions delusions and suggested she eat better.“ From the humble beginnings in the French community of St. Margaret Mary, it took almost 200 years for the feast to be extended to the universal Church. However, the revelations St. Margaret Mary received included one of the most iconic images of Jesus today: with a heart surrounded by the crown of thorns, with flames of love and a cross just above it. 

A human heart? God wants us to look upon Jesus’ humanity in the most critical muscle of the body — the heart that pumps life-giving blood throughout all of one’s being. It is central to the Love Jesus wants to lavish on mankind. Christ loves us so much, the heart just isn’t beating, it’s on fire! The Sacred Heart of Jesus burns for you! He reminds us that He died for us on the cross, and it is through the sufferings of our daily crosses that we can deepen our relationship with Him. Love is not a solitary thing. As intimate as the Sacred Heart is to us, we are reminded of the sins of humanity, including ours, that surround the heart with piercing thorns. For all those who reject Jesus, deny Him, and turn against Him, His Heart suffers and is constricted by those who offend His Love. 

Jesus desires a devotion to His Sacred Heart so that those who answer the call can draw closer to Him, enjoying the blessings and consolations that only He can give. He has made many different promises depending on how the faithful honor His Will. There are special blessings for those that display and honor the image of His Sacred Heart within their homes. Other blessings are for those that promote adoration, devotion, and enthronement within a household. Jesus also promised special graces to those who attend Mass on the first Friday of every month for nine consecutive months. These promises are not meant to be a “purchase” or “bargaining” plan, but rather they are set forth to underscore just how powerful Jesus’ love is for us. By uniting ourselves with Jesus’ Sacred Heart and inviting Him to live within us, we welcome His transformative Love to change us more to His image and likeness.  

God has called us to be holy as He is Holy, but we cannot do so by our own merits. He sent His Son, Jesus, to be our Savior and reestablish humanity’s relationship with the Divine. Jesus has provided the Sacraments and the Church as the vehicles we can use to initiate and develop that relationship. Devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus allows us to dive into a deeper intimacy, connecting the Sacrament of the Eucharist with the Divine Mercy through the Passion, Death, and Resurrection. As St. Augustine wrote in his Confessions, “You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in You.” May we take time this month to contemplate, praise, adore, and pray to the Sacred Heart of Jesus and offer our hearts to Him. 

Catholic Girl Journey Logo

Love better

After hearing a popular song in various places, some of the lyrics made me start to ponder how a person could love “better.” Instead I discovered a different definition for sin.

While I tend to listen to Christian music rather than the mainstream popular music, there’s been a song I’ve noticed in videos on Facebook and Instagram. I had no idea what it was called or who sang it until I happened to watch a YouTube video that was reviewing the quality of popular music from a musical composition perspective. The mysterious song was uncovered to be “Flowers” by Miley Cyrus. It is quite a catchy tune, but the main lyrics give a list of superficial actions that are supposed to equate to love, with the main message/refrain being “I can love me better than you can.”

Earworm is the term used to describe a song or part of a song that keeps repeating in one’s mind. And the chorus of this song was fully entrenched in my brain. It felt like a bad game of whack-a-mole, only it was wack-a-song — everytime it popped up in my brain, I would try thinking of another song, which quickly reverted back to the unwanted one. The more I thought about it, the sillier the song seemed to be. If the writer is only seeing things like flowers, dancing, and holding hands as love, then no wonder the relationship is failing. It is a pop song, so I know I can’t take it too seriously, but some simple songs can convey great meaning; this is just not one of them. 

While I’m not quite sure about the thought process that led me from thinking about the lyrics of the song to a relationship with God, somehow my brain ended up wondering about the attitude of that song as a response to God. That’s when the ton of bricks fell on my head and I realized that’s EXACTLY what sin is! There can be many definitions of sin, most of them from a negation perspective like not doing God’s will or turning away from God. However, sin is choosing ourselves over God, like the song says, we say to God that we can love ourselves better than He can. It’s almost painful to write that and to see it in black and white. It’s totally not possible for us to love ourselves better than God can. We don’t even know ourselves as much as God knows us, as He knows our full story since He exists outside of time and space. We can only know our present and our past, our future is still a mystery for us. Everything we have comes from God: the world around us, our family and friends, our talents and personality, every breath that we take, and every beat of our heart.

Our human nature wants to be in control. Love is risky as we need to open ourselves up and trust another. Yet God has proven Himself over many generations, throughout the Scriptures, through the lives of the saints, and even within our own lives. The only way we can love ourselves better, is when we let God love us. When we open ourselves to trust Him, His will, and respond to that love by showering others with the love He shows us. We can all try to love better, but no one can love better than Love Himself, who came to earth, proclaimed the kingdom of God, gave His life for us, all so that we can have a personal relationship with Him. 

God is the perfection of Love. Perhaps the next time we examine our conscience, maybe we reflect on the ways that we’ve told God either in word or deed, that we love ourselves more than He. It may be painful at first, but through the merciful love of God, we may be able to love better by loving as God does.

Catholic Girl Journey Logo

Stay the course

It’s been almost two years since God blessed me with a new job. And while I still believe that there is a purpose for me to be where I’m at, it doesn’t mean that there aren’t challenges that make me question why I am here.

I know that a life of living out the Catholic faith will not be all sugar and sprinkles. Jesus didn’t say that we’re going to breeze through to heaven, but reminded his disciples on multiple occasions that His life on earth is an example for all and that we all need to pick up our crosses to follow Him. A life of faith is not only comprised of going to Mass to meet the Sunday and Holy Day obligations, but permeates throughout my daily activities. Somehow it seems a lot easier to praise God and thank Him for when things are going well, than to trust Him and His guidance when the opposite is true. It’s almost like I’m happy He’s at “the wheel” in good times, but in difficult situations, I want to take control. From a faith perspective it makes absolutely no sense, as God has a better perspective on the rough patches and what’s needed than I do. Somehow I feel like it’s my testing moment and I’m cheating on the test if I ask for His assistance. 

Recently at work I made a recommendation that ended up being passed over. My initial feelings were of anger, as I felt responsible for this particular activity. But when the leadership deemed not to abide with my suggestions, it was a blow to my motivation, trust, and ego. They brought me in because of my familiarity with the system and here they were making judgements as if they knew better than I did. Why should I bother any more? Am I really needed there, if they won’t listen to me? Or am I just being possessive of what I think I’m responsible for and do I need to allow others to “play in the sandbox with me” so to speak? I struggled to get my feelings sorted out and to be rational and reasonable about the whole situation. 

I get emails from different places about different job openings on a regular basis, although very few interest me. I mostly delete the emails without even reading them. Yet during this trial, I did start reviewing them, trying to see if one sounded like a good fit for me. However, I couldn’t help but get a sense that I still have a purpose at my current employment. I started remembering how this opportunity seemed to just drop in my lap, like a gift with a big bow on top, especially since I wasn’t even looking at the time! It can be hard to stay the course when the bumps in the road seem like they’re going to shake the car to pieces. Is it any different from the occasions recorded in the Gospels where the disciples were terrified during strong storms on the sea? In one account Jesus calms the wind and the waves and chides the disciples for not having faith, in another Jesus invites Peter to walk out on the water to Him. In both cases, Jesus does take control and they stay the course to their destiny. 

After much reflection, I realized that while it is important for me to give my recommendations, I also need to let leadership take responsibility for their decisions as well. I may not like it, but it’s one less thing for me to stress about if I let it go. I found it a bit incredulous how easy it was to blow up over one thing that didn’t go my way than to appreciate the many times that I have brought valuable knowledge and perspective based on my experience. 

This time the challenge happened within the realm of my employment, but it could have easily been a situation within a relationship with friends, family or even a complete stranger. Challenges and trials are part of life, but those of faith are called to seek out the assistance of God. It doesn’t mean that the difficulties will go away, only that we will have the accompaniment of God as we move through them. And no, it’s not cheating, it’s a way to get closer to God and see His handiwork close up. What could be better than that?