Why does God allow you to be tempted? It’s a question that many wrestle with no matter what they believe. In pondering it recently, I’m beginning to wonder if it’s actually a benefit to us.

Let’s make one thing clear: God does NOT tempt us, ever. God only allows us to be tempted by the fallen angels. God does not want us to choose against Him, but He allows us to make the choice; that’s why we have freewill. Sin is not something that we happen into, but rather a choice we make about a grave moral matter, with our full knowledge and consent. There are three facets where the temptation to sin can benefit us, but only when we have formed our conscience and are knowledgeable of God and His commandments.

Temptation trains us to recognize sin. It only takes a split second for us to think, “should I do this” or “should I say that?” When we start to realize that we’re questioning our actions and responses, this is our conscience working. While we still may choose against God, once we have had the initial thought about the sin, we can reflect on how our response needs to change for the future. 

Now that we’re starting to identify opportunities to sin, temptation can be used to train us how to resist that temptation. While on earth, we will continue to sin and fall from God’s grace. But instead of bemoaning our transgressions, we can rejoice in the ability to practice resisting. Yes, you may fall, but how long has it been since the last time for this same sin? What were the conditions that encouraged the choice? As we start to listen to our conscience, we provide a feedback loop to our thoughts so that we can understand our decision making process. We may commit the same sin again and again, even when we have the intention not to, but when we reflect on our responses, we can improve our choices over time. 

Saying no to temptation is not just about choosing God’s will. It’s also about asking God for help to choose His will for us. When we practice turning away from sinful opportunities, we should also be asking God, the angels, and/or the saints for assistance. It’s not a pass/fail closed-book test, but rather a phone-a-friend opportunity. We can lean on God, tell Him how hard it is to make our choice, ask Him for assistance in saying no. When we are successful in choosing God over sin, notice the peace that comes with that decision. If there is a saint that struggled in the same way, reach out for their continued intercession. 

Lastly, temptation illustrates how our desires can be misleading. Sometimes we really want that piece of cake, but if we already had one piece — or two — another is not what our bodies need; it is a gluttonous act. Our feelings and desires are good things, but not when we become a slave to them. How we feel will change from moment to moment and will never be fully satisfied on earth. And when that extra piece of cake results in a stomach ache, our desires have brought us harm rather than happiness. 

While we should never actively look for temptation, having the perspective of how it can benefit us can reduce our fear of it and our disappointment when we fall. God uses all things — including our sins, our sufferings, our temptations — to strengthen our relationship with Him.

This is not the post I wanted to write. Right now I’m trying to trust in God’s timing, because I do believe He knows what is best for me. However, I don’t know what that is, so each day has a level of struggle to it. But this is exactly what it means to be a Christian — to believe in the midst of the struggle.

In March I found out that the company I was working at was reorganizing and that as of the middle of June, I would no longer have employment there. While I was panicked at first, I did find peace as the details solidified around the timing. I had three months to start my job search and I put my whole effort into it. I even got as far as a final interview, and was wondering if I would stay until my end date. I was looking forward to writing about a post of how God took care of me (as He always does) and how wonderful He is. It’s now July and I have not found employment yet. I’ve submitted over 100 applications, and have some interest, but nothing further. Does that mean that God is not taking care of me? No, I know He still is. Does that mean He’s not wonderful? No, God will always be wonderful, no matter what happens. 

Some days, I can lean in and find true peace. I am calm and can find joy in the small things, and even in the crazy way my cats behave. Other days are more challenging. Some days are rather soggy; it can be frustrating to start crying without any specific thing prompting it. Then there are the days that I feel the struggle so deeply, that I feel ashamed at not having enough trust in God. The shame, though, is not from God, but from the evil one who wants me to break my faith in God. Even Jesus, when praying in the garden of Gethsemane, said, “Abba, Father, all things are possible to you. Take this cup away from me, but not what I will but what you will.” (Mark 14:36) While I start each morning with the surrender novena, this is the hardest season of practicing trust in God that I have experienced thus far. 

If I was in a position to retire, I think I’d be okay in filling my days with various activities and volunteer events. I am enjoying attending Mass during the weekday, and it’s a great way to get the day started. However, my days are filled with online job searching, applying, tracking the applications, and all the other little details that one doesn’t think about unless they are in these circumstances. I’m using the LinkedIn app, which is part job postings and part professional social media. Some of the posts indicate that folks have been searching for six months, a year, or even longer. Some are on the verge of losing their home. I need to find something within the next six months, or I fear I will lose my home too. As hard as it sounds, that may be God’s will for me. Just the thought brings me to tears. In the book of Job, he lost everything. While he questioned God, he didn’t turn away from Him, and was rewarded with an even richer life. I know I’m no Job, but I have jokingly said to God that the longer it takes for me to find a position, it better be something grand.

We are called always to rejoice in God, no matter what we are facing. “God gives and God takes away; blessed be God,” is one of the phrases that comes to mind. As much as I do try to find joy in the little things, when tears are streaming down my face, words seem impossible, let alone trying to praise God in that moment. I’m trying to remind myself that I’m still on a faith journey, which won’t end in this lifetime. Another reminder is the saying, “God does not give us more than we can handle.” While that is meant to be a comfort, sometimes it feels that God has way more confidence in what I can handle than I do. I am practicing my trust in God. I am trying to put my faith over my fears of what’s to come. As someone who plans things out in advance, these circumstances are especially stressful. It’s definitely giving a whole new meaning to the words of the Our Father, “give us this day our daily bread,” where we ask for just what we need for the day we are in. 

I know God loves me, no matter what happens, and He will see me through it, no matter how unpaletable it is to me. The job market is saturated with all the layoffs happening all over the country. I pray for all of those who are in the same struggle I am. Yet, my prayer is my favorite first two lines of Psalm 103: 

Bless the LORD, oh my soul; and all my being, bless his holy name!
Bless the LORD, oh my soul; and forget not his benefits.

This weekend is Father’s Day and I’ve been thinking about the life of Saint Joseph. While we may not know as much about him as we do Mary or Jesus, I think there is enough evidence of how much of a fatherly role model he displays.

While there are no words attributed to Joseph in scriptures, that doesn’t mean he was mute. We would not know the details of his dreams unless he shared them with another, most likely his wife Mary. And the first dream we hear about in Matthew is about Mary. “Joseph her husband, since he was a righteous man, yet unwilling to expose her to shame, decided to divorce her quietly.” (Matt 1:19) When I read this one verse, I think of Joseph as a human parallel to God. He seeks both justice and mercy at the same time. If it was by means other than the Holy Spirit, Mary would have had to face consequences, however Joseph wasn’t interested in a harsh punishment, the divorce alone would have been enough. Many times it seems that justice and mercy need to be at odds and that you can’t have both. But Joseph shows that it is possible in the course of normal human judgements. God shows it’s possible when He sent Jesus to be our Savior, taking on the burden of sin and restoring the ability of humanity to have a relationship with God.

God allowed Joseph to wrestle with the issue of Mary’s pregnancy and come to a decision before He intervened. We don’t know how close Joseph came to divorcing Mary, only that his decision was made. Yet, Joseph was open to God’s will and to God changing his mind. Did God communicate at other times with Joseph via his dreams before this? We don’t know. Either Joseph knew how God communicated with him and accepted the change in plans, or he really did want to marry Mary. Maybe it’s both! However, since God uses dreams three more times to communicate to Joseph what to do, I think God may have been guiding Joseph this way for a while. Here again Joseph is being a role model in having a relationship with God, being able to recognize when God is directing him, and responding to God’s will. Joseph also trusted God when the way forward was dangerous and unexpected. He took Mary and baby Jesus to Egypt, provided for them, and kept them safe.

The last time we see Joseph is when Jesus is so-called lost in the Temple. While it may appear that Joseph was neglectful in his parenting duties, Jesus was old enough to, well, know better. If Joseph and Mary both thought Jesus was part of the traveling group amongst their friends and relatives, he was probably an early teenager or just about that age. Jesus probably had responsibilities at home, and maybe while traveling too. Here again, Joseph does not let Jesus face the consequences of His action of staying behind. Rather, Joseph and Mary pursue finding Jesus to return Him to their household. Joseph may only be a foster father to Jesus, but he seeks a relationship with his son. Fathers are not meant to raise their children and then cut all ties, but to continually seek out their children and reinforce the bond of kinship between them. This mirrors the way God is always inviting us to a closer relationship with Himself.

Although Jesus has a Divine Father, He also had an earthly one. God felt it was important that Jesus have a father figure in His life. While Joseph was not perfect like God the Father, he nevertheless dedicated himself to God and God’s will being done on earth. The scriptures could have been written with very little mention of Joseph, but God wanted us to know the actions of Joseph and to see him as a role model, both as a father and as a seeker of God’s will.

When I feel the need to stop and rest a bit but want to keep my hands busy, I sometimes reach for a Christian coloring book. Often the words are either from scripture or are meant to inspire and can be presented in a variety of ways. Recently, I had to choose how to color two opposing words; how do I choose the color for each?

The Colorful Blessings coloring book by The Coloring Cafe are whimsical illustrations that allow me to take a break from life. Usually I enjoy the challenge of identifying what colored pencil I want to use within the picture. This page, however, has only three words in big, bold, block letters: FAITH over FEAR. While there are various patterned squares surrounding the central text, they pale in comparison to the message. What color is faith? What color is fear? How do you balance the color choices? 

I colored the word FAITH first. Some may choose a sunshiny yellow to make the word glow on the page. Others may choose red reminiscent of the fire of the Holy Spirit. Perhaps another may choose a shade of blue, especially if it evokes the color of a pool of water. My instinct was to reach out to the richest green I had, not too dark, but a saturated green. I colored the first three letters and then paused. Should I have used several different shades of green? But since almost half the word was already colored, it felt the right thing to do was to complete it in the chosen color. I’m glad I used only one color as it matches the boldness of the letters. For me, green is the color of hope. I don’t think you can have faith without having hope. Faith gives us the ability to lean on God for all we need and to see us not just through our life here on earth, but into eternity with Him. We cannot see or know what life will be like after death, but we know that our souls will live on because of the hope we have through Jesus.

Now for the word FEAR. I considered a dark purple to try to convey the sinister nature of fear. Orange was another option because it evokes danger and caution. I was even trying to see if I had or could mix two colors for a “cat-puke” color, which would be a horrid mix of mustard yellow and brown. Then my eye spotted the perfect pencil for the job. This one actually had a name for the color: gray mist. How evocative of the word fear is a gray that is only almost on the page. This wasn’t a pale gray, but a medium gray that colored lightly on the page. The word FEAR couldn’t compete with the word FAITH with those color choices. 

As I was filling in the letters for FEAR, I started thinking about what it is. Fear is when we recognize that we are not in control of a situation and/or do not know what the outcome of an event will be and the desire for that control. When we feel that we are fearful, we need to call on God to help us through. Times of fear are when we need to pray, “Jesus, I trust in You.” When we trust in God, we surrender the outcomes of life to his Providence. He always wants to richly bless us. While His timeline may not match ours, He will guide us through the most trying of circumstances. Just like Simon the Cyrene helped Jesus to carry His cross, Jesus helps us to carry our crosses, no matter how heavy they seem. 

True faith will always overcome fear. True faith requires us to cultivate an active, participatory relationship with God. Daily prayers, Mass, the Sacraments as well as helping in our communities all serve to strengthen our faith. And a vibrant faith will make the mist of fear burn away through the glory and grace of God.