relationship with God

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Title or vocation?

This past Sunday the Church celebrated the feast of the Holy Trinity. In an effort to try to understand God better in this feast, we tend to describe aspects of God with titles or labels. Yet the true essence of God cannot be summarized down into a few words. As a reflection of God, the same is true with us, even if we label ourselves. 

WIthin the Trinity, we usually identify each person by what He does: Creator, Redeemer, and Sanctifier. None of these descriptions fully delve deeply enough to really have a relationship with God. The Creator has asked us to address Him as Father, and one could write a whole book about the deeper meanings of why this title is so important. We call the second person in the Trinity Jesus, because He was born at a point in time and was addressed by that name. There is a whole litany of the name and titles of Jesus, and Redeemer is just one of them. The third person of the Trinity also has a number of descriptive labels: Comforter, Advocate, Paraclete, and even the name changed in English from Holy Ghost to Holy Spirit because of shifts in language and meanings.

As humans, we like to use descriptions to categorize ourselves. Our first title is that of being a daughter or son when we are born, setting us in relationship to those responsible for us. If we have siblings, then we may be called brother or sister, or even more descriptively as older brother and younger sister. As we grow we become students and may augment our titles by the activities in which we are involved: soccer player, swimmer, dancer, pianist. Some of these titles may see us well into adulthood, and for a few may become their career. For others these will fade into the background of our experience or be relegated to that of a hobby. 

As adults we typically can indicate the title of how we want the world to see us. For many it may be the role they have in their career. For those who work as doctors, nurses, lawyers, and CEOs, etc., most people will have a general sense of what they do and what their responsibilities are. My title at my company is not really a true reflection of what I do and when someone inquires about my job, I usually describe what I work with (websites) rather than my title (product owner), since it does not convey the same understanding as other job titles. Some folks may describe me as a baker, since I enjoying baking all sorts of delectables like breads, cakes, brownies, and cookies. However, since I only bake occasionally, I wouldn’t consider myself a baker. With my newfound enjoyment of weaving, I strive to work multiple times a week on my current project, yet again, since it is not my profession, I would only use the term weaver in describing it as one of my hobbies. Depending on the person or audience we’re introducing ourselves to, we may choose one title over another based on the relevance we perceive the others will be receptive to.

After all these years, I can remember being taught about vocations in the Catholic elementary school I attended. Vocation isn’t just a job, not merely an action, but a call from God to a particular state in life. I remember learning the three states: marriage, religious, and single life. In looking up the definition for vocation, Merriam-Webster says, “summons or strong inclination to a particular state or course of action; especially: a divine call to the religious life.” The etymology of the word derives from words that mean “to summon,” “to call,” and “voice.” Since we live in such a secular culture, the thought of having a calling from God is not well received. When husbands and wives talk about their vocation as being the most important in their life, the outcry that other titles should have a higher priority only serves to illustrate the lack of faith in society. There are sacraments for both marriage and the priesthood, yet other religious vows and the call to the single life can have the perception of being less important because there is no corresponding sacrament. However, God calls everyone to their unique vocation, so that not one vocation is “better” than another. We need all three types of vocations, as they work in concert with the others to support our earthly journey. With our free will, it’s up to us to either embrace God’s call or reject it.

Titles may come and go in our life and the labels we use to describe ourselves will shift over time. Yet it is our response to the vocation that God is calling us to that will determine if we achieve the final summons of God to become a saint and live in eternity with Him. 

Unity

With Pentecost coming up next Sunday, I was pondering what to write, and what kept jumping out at me, even while reading prayers in the Magnificat, was the word unity. 

At first, I thought it was very odd that unity kept coming to mind. I first brushed it aside and tried to think about aspects of the Holy Spirit, and again, unity came to mind. The Holy Spirit is the third person in the Trinity because it is the shared love between God the Father and God the Son. The Holy Spirit is, literally, the unity between Father and Son. Yet, my thought process wanted to write something about Pentecost being the birthday of the Church and the Holy Spirit being a central focus of the event. Unity is a lovely concept, but I can’t just put the single word in my post and be done with it. However, when the Spirit prompts, it’s way easier to go with the flow than for me to try and write what I think I should write.

No matter how mindful or empathetic I try to be, it’s all too easy for me to judge situations that I feel infringed upon. I think our society is so skewed towards the rights of the individual that it has lost sight of being a society itself, that is a gathering or community of people. In our attempt to connect with others, we like and share content on social media platforms. Yet that is not true interaction; it’s not listening to another and learning about them and their perspectives. Some take advantage of not seeing others to freely criticize them, and may cross the line from opinion to verbal abuse. We use the right of free speech as a shield and excuse to say whatever we want. However, as Catholic Christians we are called to unity; not just with God but with each other.

The Apostles, with the exception of John, deserted Jesus during His passion and death. When He returned after His resurrection, He showered His peace on them; both forgiving them and reinforcing the bond among them all. There are many times when we fail to follow God’s plan or commandments, yet He calls us back to a relationship with Him in the sacrament of Reconciliation.  When we return to walking with God, we are in communion with Him and all others who are in communion with Him: past, present, and future. God gathers us up to Himself, not just as individuals, but also into a community of His creation. It is Satan that scatters, the one who does not want to see God’s desire for unity in His creation to succeed. Satan is our accuser, the one who points out our faults and makes us feel that we are not worthy to be with God. While the latter is true, we can never be worthy on our own merit, but through Jesus Christ we can have a relationship with God and a seat at the heavenly banquet. Here again we have a theme of community. How many times in the Bible does it reference heaven as a feast or meal? We have heard that God calls us to this fellowship, this unity with others. But here on earth we look inward towards our own desires. We acknowledge others only to complain when they impede what we want.

If we truly want to have a relationship with God, we cannot have a mindset that our relationships with other people have no impact on our relationship with God. If we want a better relationship with God, one way to do it is to start looking at how we treat the people around us: in our families, our workplaces, our church, and any other place we go. Do we see each as a person, created by God with a unique set of gifts and talents? Do we treat them with the respect and dignity they deserve as sons and daughters of God, regardless of their professed religion? We may not agree with their perspectives and may bristle at the way they treat us, but that does not give us permission to discard them as not worthy of our time, attention, and respect. 

Pentecost is not just the birthday of the Church, rather it is a call of unity to all creation. The Apostles spoke in various tongues to bring the message of Jesus to all those scattered by different languages. They preached Jesus risen as our savior. They called for those who would listen to them to repent and be baptized so that they could receive the Holy Spirit, which is the unifying love between God the Father and God the Son. Unity does, indeed, sum up Pentecost and the greatest gift of the Trinity. 

Mary at the Cathedral of St. Matthew the Apostle, Washington DC

A very human mother

Jesus gave his mother Mary to be our spiritual mother just before He died on the cross. However, I think it’s very easy to forget that Mary was a very human mother to Jesus. 

When Mary gave her consent to Gabriel to be the mother of the Savior, she was not just a mere host for a divine creature. Rather God was able to fertilize her egg so that Jesus would receive His human flesh from Mary. While the conception of Jesus had a supernatural component, God allowed the natural progression of human time to: form Jesus in Mary’s womb, have Mary give birth naturally to Jesus, have Mary and Joseph raise Jesus from a baby to a boy to a teenager until He became a man. Jesus was fully human (and fully divine), and experienced all the emotions a human being can. Mary was a witness to her Son’s humanity throughout His life, but most especially when He was a child. If Jesus fell carrying the cross, He certainly must have taken a tumble like all children do as they are learning to walk or during play with other children. And if these incidents resulted in skinned knees and bruises, Jesus probably cried a number of times, just as He would as an adult when He wept for His dead friend Lazarus. In the movie, The Passion of the Christ, there is one scene I remember when Jesus was washing up before a meal and playfully splashed His mother. While movies are afforded the ability to add scenes that may not be historically documented, I loved that this was included because it beautifully illustrated the bond between mother and Son and their shared humanity. While there may not be documentation for that incident, I’m sure there were plenty of that type while Jesus was growing up. 

While most of Jesus’ early years are undocumented in the Gospels, there is no doubt that Mary and Jesus shared an intense mother-son bond. While the best example of this is Mary at the foot of the cross, another example is at the wedding feast in Cana. It is at Mary’s prompting that Jesus performs His first public miracle. Reflections of this Gospel passage are mostly from a spiritual perspective, but what about from a purely human exchange? Mary knows Jesus and what He is capable of doing: working miracles. She does not ask Him to make more wine, rather she simply informs Him of the issue at hand: “They have no wine.” (John 2:3) Many commentaries have analyzed Jesus’ response, but since Jesus was at the beginning of His ministry, perhaps it was not yet time to have such a big public miracle, like the multiplication of the loaves and fishes. Yet Mary is keen to make sure that the wedding feast is not marred by the embarrassment of running out of wine. Perhaps her exchange with Jesus was a private conversation and only those in the most intimate circle of friends were aware. Mary does not know how Jesus will solve the issue, but directs the wait staff to follow Jesus’ directions, which end up sounding very ordinary until they are directed to draw some water and have the headwaiter taste it. In John’s Gospel, he conveys, “…and his disciples began to believe in Him.” (John 2:11). It seems as if only the disciples who accompanied Him at this point were aware of the miracle. The Gospel does not seem to indicate that anyone else from the wedding were aware of what happened; or maybe they were too busy enjoying the result of the miracle to comprehend what happened. 

As we celebrate Mother’s Day this coming weekend, let us remember the motherhood of Mary, in its very human aspects, for it is in the culmination of these human experiences that she becomes a spiritual mother to us all.

Ever present fear

It seems no matter how strong our faith is, fear is always present, waiting in the wings of our stage of life. Fear can be a good thing, as it makes us cautious and causes us to think before taking action. It can also be crippling and prevent the will of God in us. 

In reviewing the Mass readings for this past Sunday, I only got as far as the first line of the first reading in the Acts of the Apostles. I had to stop and read it several times over, almost marveling at what it conveyed. The books of the Bible convey the most important details of what is needed to deliver its message, but sometimes the smallest detail can slip by us and we miss the wisdom it brings. The reading is just after Saul is converted and, after spending time in Damascus, has returned to Jerusalem.  “…He tried to join the disciples, but they were all afraid of him, not believing he was a disciple.” (Acts 9:26) From a logic perspective, that makes sense; Saul left Jerusalem with approval letters that would allow him to round up those following The Way, as it was first called, and to bring them back to the city in chains for judgment. He may have returned without prisoners, but did that really mean he converted? 

It is only after one of the disciples, Barnabas, takes the responsibility of bringing him to the community that Saul is able to tell of his conversion experience and he is then welcomed and allowed to support the evangelistic efforts. Barnabas was not one of the original twelve, but rather is identified earlier in Acts as selling a piece of land and laying the profits at the feet of the Apostles. Did the Holy Spirit only prompt Barnabas to take on the role of sponsor to Saul? Or was it fear in the Apostles that hampered the Spirit’s promptings? Earlier parts of Acts record the bravery of Peter speaking out and rejoicing when they are censured by the Sanhedrin. If they are happy to experience physical punishment for speaking about Jesus in the Temple, why were they so afraid of Saul? With all the miracles they witnessed Jesus perform, why did they find it hard to believe that Jesus could convert Saul? 

Further in the book of Acts, Saul becomes Paul and the main evangelizer of the Gentile, or non-Jewish, communities. I feel like I need to ask the question, what if Saul was not accepted into the community of the disciples? Would we have all the letters he wrote that makes up a portion of the New Testament? Would he have been able to preach to the Gentiles? Paul’s conversion and writings are key, even now within the evangelization efforts of the Church. I can’t picture how different the Church would be without his impact. What would have happened if fear also prevented Barnabas from taking action? 

Between what is written in the book of Acts as well as his letters, Paul did not have an easy time in his preaching. He was shipwrecked, stoned and left for dead, and had a number of other escapes to save his life. Was Paul fearful about his life on these occasions? Yet in his second letter to Timothy, Paul seems to know his end is near and calmly says he is “being poured out like a libation, and the time of my departure is at hand.” (2 Tim. 4:6) Perhaps it is because of his difficult experiences that he is able to not to be afraid of death, but welcome it when it becomes imminent. 

Fear will be something that we will need to confront many times throughout our earthly life. Let us pray for open hearts to the Spirit’s promptings during these times, or for us to have a person like Barnabas to take charge and help us through our fear so that God’s will can be accomplished. 

Holy Tabernacle

Are you a holy tent? If you are a baptized Catholic who receives the Holy Eucharist, you certainly are! How can this be, if we are all sinners?

In reflecting on the Easter seasons and its readings, there are so many that point back to the Last Supper and the institution of the Eucharist. This gift of Jesus is celebrated and adored throughout the year, but we pay special attention to it in the Easter season. During Mass, the hosts are consecrated and then distributed with any remaining then reserved in a tabernacle. The etymology of tabernacle comes from the Latin word for tent or hut. This evokes back to Exodus and when the Israelites wandered through the desert and a special tent was pitched for God to dwell amongst the people. God gave Moses specific instructions for its construction, consecration, the worship conducted within it, and its maintenance. While most think of a tabernacle as an item within a church building, made of elaborate metalwork, we forget that we who receive Jesus in the Holy Sacrament then become, ourselves, living tabernacles of the Lord. Jesus is “pitching” His tent within us, each and every time we receive Him. Do we welcome His presence in this way? Or do we just acknowledge His closeness to give Him a list of our troubles that we need His help with? We all need God’s help in so many ways that it’s natural for us to unburden ourselves to Him. However, Easter is the perfect time to take a different perspective with our Eucharistic encounter at Mass. 

“Do you not know that your body is a temple of the holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? For you have been purchased at a price. Therefore, glorify God in your body.” (1 Cor 6:19) The idea of a human person being a temple, tabernacle, or dwelling place of God, is acknowledged by Paul in his first letter to the Corinthians. So, it’s not just when we receive Jesus in Mass that God dwells within us, but we are claimed as temples of the Holy Spirit from the time of our baptism. This gift of God is further reinforced with the sacrament of Confirmation, as we are sealed with the Spirit by the laying of hands by the bishop (or priest) and the sacred chrism oil. It is also these three sacraments, Baptism, Confirmation, and Holy Eucharist, that are considered the sacraments of initiation to become a Christian, a follower and disciple of Christ Jesus. And it is these three sacraments that are celebrated at the Easter Vigil or throughout the Easter season, depending on the needs and schedule of the parish.

God wants a personal relationship with us. Not just a quick visit once a week to check off that obligation, but to truly dwell in us at every moment of our lives. He sent His Son to be our Savior, the one who heals the brokenness caused when humanity chose their own desires over trust in God. God the Father and God the Son send God the Holy Spirit into the world to sanctify it, to make it holy so that we can have a relationship with the Triune God, listening to Him and trusting His will for us. One way we respond is to have a consistent prayer life, for example morning and evening prayer, or a daily rosary. It’s setting time aside to be attentive to God. 

God is not surprised when our human nature gets in the way. It’s why Jesus gave us Himself at the Last Supper, and upon His resurrection, directed the Apostles to receive the ability to forgive sins, something that only God can truly do. By frequenting the sacraments of Holy Communion and Reconciliation, we can better maintain the dwelling place within ourselves for God. No one, even the saints, is worthy to be a dwelling for God by his or her own merit. It is only through our cooperation with His Will for us that we can be a tent for God to dwell. And if we are a dwelling for God, then we bring Him everywhere we go and to everyone we meet. Others can see this reflection of God by our actions and our words. We embody the Trinity, that is we give our body as a reflection of our relationship with God to those we encounter. That is the makings of a saint, who dwells with God after his or her earthly life is complete.

During this seasonal focus on the Eucharist, let us take the time to think of God as living within us every day. Let us strive to be a Holy Tabernacle that pleases Him, welcomes His presence, and remains attentive to His call.

Who is Jesus

What would you say if someone asked you which holiday was more important: Christmas or Easter? How we answer this question can shape how we view Jesus and our relationship with Him.

From the perspective of society, Christmas seems much more popular and celebrated than Easter. We don’t have Easter parties all month long, nor do we celebrate in our workplaces, our neighborhoods, or in our hobbies/sports affiliations. Even those who don’t believe in Jesus will decorate a tree in their home and exchange gifts. Christmas preparations and celebrations can last from the middle of November into the beginning of the New Year. Easter seems to be a holiday that is acceptable to celebrate, but not completely embraced. There may be egg hunts, but those are usually activities for children. Children may get their picture taken with the Easter bunny, but the draw is not as intense as it is for Santa Claus, nor will the resulting photo be included in Easter cards that are sent out as holiday greetings.

Theologically, you can’t have Easter without Christmas. However, Jesus being born into the world was not the saving action; His Passion, Death, and Resurrection are what healed the relationship between God and humanity. Mother Church in her wisdom celebrates Easter for 50 days, which is much longer than the Christmas season. For those who attend Mass every Sunday, the Gospel is getting rather repetitive. For three weeks now we have heard the Resurrected Jesus appearing on that first day of the week. For those hoping this upcoming Sunday’s Gospel will be different, you’re only half correct. While the Gospel is not another aspect of Jesus appearing to His disciples, it is Good Shepherd Sunday. The second line is, “A good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.” (John 10:11) Being in the Easter season, it causes us to recall the Holy Triduum we celebrated just a few weeks ago. 

So why is Easter so important? Each year we are called to prepare during Lent for Easter. And each Easter season, we are called to renew our Baptismal promises. We hear again and again about the disciples seeing Jesus in His resurrected form. Each of these is an opportunity to renew our belief in and relationship with Jesus. If we believe that Jesus is who He said He is, the Son of God, then we can’t be satisfied with a wishy-washy faith. He can’t just be a nice man who told people to be nice to other people and had wise things to say. Belief in Jesus calls us to action; we are to be doers of the Word, not just hearers of the Word. At the same time, we can’t just run off on our own and think we know what Jesus wants us to do. We are all called with different gifts and skill sets. In order to act upon His Word, we need a relationship with Jesus, one we pursue as if our lives depended on it — because our everlasting lives do. 

Many think that Easter is long past, having been celebrated last month, and it is no longer relevant.  This couldn’t be further from the truth. Each Mass is both a mini Christmas and a mini Easter, celebrating Jesus coming in flesh and blood — hidden within the bread and wine — and recalls the Words from the Last Supper, the memory of His death and His resurrection. And every time we participate in Mass, we have the opportunity to seek a deeper relationship with Jesus and to give thanks to God for His amazingly generous love and mercy. 

In our ever-changing world, let us not lose sight of who Jesus is for us and pursue a relationship with Him, both in the Easter season and beyond. 

Beautiful brokenness

As we spend the next several weeks celebrating the resurrection of Jesus, I think most focus on the resurrection itself and less on the body. Now that the painful Passion is behind us, we can bathe in the love and immortality that God bestows on those who believe in His Son. But there is still a body to contend with; how do we understand the risen form of Jesus?

The Gospel of John presents two very different approaches to the resurrected Christ. The first account is of Mary Magdalene who upon recognizing Jesus embraced His feet. His response to her was “Stop holding on to me… .” (John 20:17) It seems a curious address to someone whom He loved. Jesus’ resurrected body, however, was not destined to stay on earth, but rather to return to God, the Father. The message He was conveying to Mary indicated that she should not expect for Him to remain. Jesus rose from the dead to illustrate that death was no longer a punishment, and it was just one part of His mission to reconnect humanity with God.

The second account in John’s Gospel is that of Thomas. (John 20:24-29) Most focus on “doubting Thomas” refusing to believe in the resurrection. Had he not seen Lazarus be returned from the dead at the words of Jesus? Why was it so hard for him to believe? Yet Jesus invites him to probe his wounds. For Mary Magdalene, she was to stop holding onto Jesus, but Thomas was invited to put his fingers in the nail holes and his hand in the side of Jesus that was pierced by the spear. While I feel sorry for Thomas to forever be remembered as someone who doubted Jesus, it is a powerful witness. If even those closest to Jesus had to slowly process the resurrection, it’s okay for those of us now who stumble with some of the facets of faith. When we have these times of doubt, we need to turn more to Jesus and ask Him to help us in our unbelief.

I think many want to believe that when we are resurrected, all our imperfections will be removed. Yet Jesus retained the wounds of His Passion. They may not have bled any longer, or were a source of pain, but they were still present. How is this possible? I’d like to think of it as a spiritual version of kintsugi, a Japanese technique of repairing broken objects with gold lacquer. Most of us, if we have something broken, want to hide the repair as much as possible. But in this repair process, the gold becomes the star of the show. What was once broken can now be used again, and it is beautiful because of the brokenness. Like Jesus, our wounds —physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual — will be healed through Him with a beauty that we cannot conceive. Any thoughts of what we may look like resurrected can only be a product of our limited imagination.

At each Mass we are called to encounter the Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity of Jesus when we receive the Holy Eucharist. It is a celebration of the Incarnation of Jesus as a human person from the moment of His conception and birth as well as His full divine nature of being the Son of God. While the outward appearance of bread and wine remain, the substance is forever transformed into the being of Jesus for us to receive. Here again the priest breaks the host, mingling a piece in the wine before offering to the congregation. While it may seem that Jesus’ body is divided amongst those who receive Him, in a spiritual perspective, we are the gold lacquer that brings His body together when we receive Him and then follow the promptings of the Holy Spirit to do the Father’s will. We bring beauty to Jesus on the cross when we share the love of God with others. And we can only do that when we offer our brokenness to God to heal.

“But he was pierced for our sins, crushed for our iniquity. He bore the punishment that makes us whole, by his wounds we were healed.”

Isaiah 53:5

The piercing moment

The fifth sorrow of Mary seems like it should be the last, but it is not.  It is, however,  the pinnacle of the life of Jesus. He was born of Mary to be crucified. His first throne was a manger; His last the cross. And Mary was there for it all. 

In reviewing each of the Gospels for this post, I found it interesting that Matthew and Mark mention several women named Mary, but not Jesus’ mother. Luke only mentions that the women who followed Jesus were there in the distance. How ironic that all the writers mention the women present at the crucifixion. Yet, it is John’s gospel that provides us with the exchange that Jesus gave to both John and Mary (John 19:26-27). How could her heart not ache with all the sufferings that Jesus had endured? This must have been the moment she remembered Simeon’s prophecy of the sword piercing her heart; yet she stood by the foot of the cross for her Son. 

If only it was just a moment. From the agony and arrest in the garden, to the trial by the Jewish and Roman leaders, then the scourging and crowning with thorns, followed by the carrying of the cross, Jesus had been through more than any human could endure. He was in the final stage of His Passion: nailed to a cross, lifted up and naked, condemned to a criminal’s death. The Roman soldiers passed the time by gambling for His garments. Others jeered and made fun of Him. Forgotten were all the miracles He performed. His only supporters were the youngest apostle and the women who assisted in His ministry. Did Mary know that Jesus was going to die? Did she stand at the cross hoping for a miracle? Perhaps. However, she said yes to God’s will before conceiving of Jesus, what else could she do but place Jesus into the hands of His Heavenly Father? Both Mary and Jesus put God’s will first, even though it had resulted in the death of Jesus. 

All too soon during this Lent, will be Passion Sunday, where Jesus’ Passion and Death are proclaimed as the gospel reading. I think it’s only human nature to want to get through it as quickly as possible. Not because it’s a long reading, but because it reminds us of what price Jesus paid for our sins. The price He paid so that we could have a relationship with Him, with God our Father, and with the Holy Spirit. Too often we overemphasize Jesus’ resurrection, and to some degree, we should. But we also need to remember that in order to rise, Jesus had to die. And He didn’t just die quickly and rise immediately. Jesus suffered many types of torture: mental, physical, and emotional before His death. He stayed dead for three days to illustrate that He truly died, and it wasn’t just a coma or trance that He experienced. 

As we journey through these last few weeks of Lent, let us offer up our sacrifices and penances to Mary as a symbolic way to keep her company as she stood by the foot of the cross. Perhaps she can, in turn, present them to God to assist and comfort those who are in mourning. Mary, Mother of Sorrows, pray for us. 

Mary at the Cathedral of St. Matthew the Apostle, Washington DC

Journey to a new beginning

Mary only observed the effects of Jesus’ scourging: the blood soaked through His clothes as He walked towards the place of His death. Yet the events of Jesus’ Passion and Death would provide many moments where the sword that Simeon prophesied would pierce deeply. The fourth sorrow of Mary is watching Jesus as He carried the cross towards His execution. 

While the Gospels don’t mention Jesus meeting Mary during His struggle to Golgotha, according to an article on EWTN, it is based on tradition that this event indeed occurred. The Gospels do indicate that Mary was at the foot of the cross, so she would have had to travel the same/similar road herself to get there. It is plausible that whether they were near enough to touch one another, or only close enough to make eye contact, they could have very well met on that road.

Was Mary amongst the crowd that was stirred up by the Pharisees at the praetorium? Did she hear them call for the release of Barabbas? Did she witness the crowd calling for Jesus to be crucified like a criminal? Tradition and the Gospels are silent on how much Mary observed prior to the actual death of Jesus. However, the tradition of Jesus meeting Mary as He carried the cross evokes a painful reunion for both. Mary watched Jesus grow from a little baby to an adult man, who was ready to give His life for the salvation of souls. She saw the precious Blood staining the woven garments He wore, potentially ones that she made with her own two hands. She saw the depth of depravity by the soldiers in the crown of thorns piercing His head. The protruding wood of the cross He carried was unmistakable. 

While the first three sorrows of Mary marked occasions in Jesus’ childhood, there are no mentions in the Gospel of His adolescence or in His ministry that was a cause of sorrow for Mary. I’m sure there were times, like in so many families, where Jesus’ words or actions could have been challenging for a mother. Mary assented to God’s will at the time of His conception. Her ability to do so illustrates her great trust in God. Mary knew Jesus was not an ordinary baby who would have an ordinary life. When the time for His ministry came about, she encouraged His first miracle. Still, being an itinerant teacher must have brought challenges and discouragements on occasion. But were those instances enough to prepare her for what was to come? As much as Jesus tried to prepare the disciples, most of them fled at His arrest. The Gospels capture Jesus indicating the Resurrection, something that we are familiar with, to be a concept that was foreign to His followers (Mark 9:10). Even if Mary was aware of what was to come, future joy is very hard to see when the current pain and suffering are so overwhelming.

The way of the cross seemed to be the end. After all, is there anything more final than death? Well, for God, death is not the last word. Rather it is a tool used to illustrate the power, and the love, of God. It shows that God is far beyond our being and that He has control even over something that seems so final to us. As Jesus walks towards Golgotha, it is not a journey to His end, but rather to a new beginning. As Christians, we too, will walk through the valley of death, but our baptism promises us that our soul will live on. If we choose to trust God and His will for us, our relationship with Him will be transformed beyond our wildest imagination. And at the end of time, our souls will be reunited with our bodies, so that in both body and soul, we can share in the love that God is, as it flows from Father to Son to Holy Spirit. 

We are almost at the half-way point of Lent. Regardless of how challenging or overwhelming our practices are this year, it’s not too late to reach out to Mary for assistance as we strive to grow closer to God and recognize what is prohibiting us from embracing God’s will. No matter the pain and sorrow we will face, Mary will walk us through until we reach the joy of Jesus. 

Mary at the Cathedral of St. Matthew the Apostle, Washington DC

Searching for Jesus

We are all searching for Jesus in our lives. And in one instance, Mary and Joseph were no different. They, with Jesus,  followed the custom they had been following each year, making their annual trip to Jerusalem and back. Only on the way back, it wasn’t like all the times previous. Jesus didn’t leave with the rest of His earthly relatives. The search was on.

At the cusp of adulthood but not quite there, Jesus had stayed behind in the Temple. At 12 years old, He was old enough to be responsible for Himself and His actions, but not quite old enough to be on His own. Yet He knew who He was and what He was being called to do. His parents, however, did not. We are only given a summary of the events in Luke’s Gospel (Lk 2:41-51). In the English translation, it’s hard to pinpoint just how many days Jesus was separated from Mary and Joseph. “…But supposing him to be in the company they went a day’s journey, and they sought him among their kinsfolk and acquaintances; and when they did not find him, they returned to Jerusalem, seeking him. After three days they found him in the temple…” If Mary and Joseph traveled a whole day and presumably it would take another day’s journey to return, are those days included in the three days? A separation of three days would be hard enough, but if the travel time is added onto that, then five days of separation must have seemed like an eternity to them! 

Mary and Joseph did a fair amount of traveling during Jesus’ youth. First, they traveled to Bethlehem where He was born. Then they lived in Egyptian exile while King Herod, who tried to kill Jesus, reigned in Jerusalem. They then returned to Nazareth although scripture does not tell us how old He was at the time of His return. Still, if the family had a “custom” to travel to Jerusalem yearly, I would say that journey would need to happen about five or six times in order to consider it a “custom.” After the journeys to Egypt and Nazareth, traveling with friends and relatives yearly must have been a welcome change. People were safer when they were in a group. But it also gave time to chat in a way that probably didn’t happen on a daily basis. What may have been a relaxed and enjoyable trip turned. Did Mary and Joseph travel back at night? They did flee to Egypt in the middle of the night, so it is possible. Or did they wait until morning and, as they made their return trip, did they seek Jesus in the groups that left after their party? That may have slowed their return, talking to various groups of people they encountered. Most likely, they traveled by themselves, just the two of them. 

Where did they look for Jesus in Jerusalem? Did they go back to where they stayed? Was the Temple the first place they looked or the last, after many other locations? If it actually took three days to find Jesus after they returned to Jerusalem, then the Temple was the last place they looked. It must have been such a relief to find Him and know that He was safe. When Mary asked for an explanation as to why, Jesus’ answer of attending His Father’s business was not immediately understood by them. Perhaps it took until Jesus started His preaching mission, or maybe it was at the foot of the cross that His statement began to make sense? It could have taken until after the resurrection and ascension that Mary was able to reflect on this to really understand why this event happened. 

Jesus is with us every moment of every day, yet our busy lives don’t allow us to recognize His presence. When we feel far away from Him, we need to seek Him. It may take minutes or hours or days to realize He is right there with us. When we find Him we may not understand why it took so long or why we find Him in whatever place we do. And we may not understand the answer when we immediately receive it. Mary and Joseph make up two-thirds of the Holy Family, yet they understand what it means to be separated from and to seek Jesus. Lent is a perfect opportunity to proactively practice seeking Jesus on a daily basis. Abstaining from obstacles that interrupt our hunger for God in our life will allow us to be more open to hearing God and knowing what next step to take to become closer to Him. Let us not wait until He is a “full day’s journey” from us, but rather seek Him in “His Father’s house.” Jesus is waiting at every church and in every tabernacle that contains the consecrated hosts. Let us not just look for Jesus, but let’s find Him!