Author: catholicgirljourney-kc

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Catholic Girl Journey

Endings and beginnings

All things must come to an end. For example, November is the month that the Church calendar ends. And like a wise mother, she uses this month to prepare us for our own life’s ending by reminding us what we are living for: heaven. 

The first day of November is the grand celebration of All Saints Day. It is the feast day for every human who is in heaven, not just the canonized saints. Someday even we, hopefully, will be among them as “God made us to know Him, love Him and serve Him in this world in order to be forever happy with Him in the next.” This is what we spend our lives on earth striving for.   Now is the time to think about all the saints we can remember by name and how they have served God. Then we turn our reflections inward to discover how we can emulate them and ask what is God asking of us? The saints are in a fabulous position to help us, as they are with God; we only need to ask for their guidance and support.

The second day in November, and indeed the rest of the month, is a celebration and remembrance of all the holy souls in purgatory. These are the people whose imperfections have kept them from entering heaven upon their death. They are assured of heaven, but need to purify themselves of their temporal punishment due to sin. Referred to as the Church suffering, we pray for them, offering Mass and small deeds of charity on their behalf, asking God to hasten their welcome into heaven. These can be members of our family and friends or they could be strangers from another generation from another part of the world.

Towards the end of the month, we celebrate the solemnity of Our Lord Jesus Christ the King of the Universe marking the last Sunday of the Church’s calendar.  What a grand title that evokes superlative majesty! And so it should be. Every day of the year we walk with Jesus in His life on earth with every gospel reading. We know Him as the person He was when He was on the earth. But He continues to be a person, seated next to Father God and reigns with Him as king over all creation in the universe: every moon, star, planet and galaxy.

We end the Church’s liturgical calendar recognizing that our ending is just the beginning of life everlasting. We strive to know, love and serve God today so that we can be welcomed into heaven, and have hope that our imperfections will not detain us too long in purgatory, so that we can be together with the communion of saints forever praising Jesus our King.

Catholic Girl Journey

Facing fears

I know I should not be afraid, but I am. I don’t like scary movies; I don’t like the suspense; and I don’t like being scared. October is my least favorite time of the year, as it seems like no matter where I look, there is some advertisement for a scary movie or fright-fest event.

I suppose one of the reasons I have this fear is because I see these scary things as manifestations of evil, intended or not.  I know that evil exists in the world. It can be subtle and enticing and look like a good thing; or it can be hideous and frightening. But what can it do to me? Can it hurt me? Sure. It can even test my faith. However, I know that as long as I have hope and cling to my faith in God, it can never overpower me. Jesus says, “Do not be afraid of those who kill the body and do no more.” (Lk 12:4). Yet I still do not want to see even the advertisements for these activities as they plant seeds of doubt. I wonder if my faith is strong enough?

We are all challenged daily in our faith and our trust in God. Sometimes the test is easily passed, other times it is a struggle that seems to linger. Either way, God is with us each step of the way, even if we don’t feel His presence. Even so, part of me wants to  avoid these activities because I don’t want to see these scary things, thus avoiding the struggle. But if that were the case, then I wouldn’t want to see or talk to anyone, since we’re all struggling to some degree.

I want to see the good in things. If the main intent of these various seasonal “amusements” is to scare us because they represent evil, then it’s hard to see any good in it. They block us from seeing goodness and God around us. In a Word on Fire blog, Fr. Grunow talks about exorcism and the entertainment industry’s embrace of that theme. He quotes from the novel, The Exorcist, “I think the point is to make us despair. To see ourselves as animal and ugly. To make us reject the possibility that God could love us.”

I’d like to think that my aversion for such things is a gift from God that acts as a shield from temptation and the accompanying struggle.

Catholic Girl Journey

What does your soul look like?

The human being, as a child of God, is made up of both body and soul. You look at yourself in the mirror and see your body, but have you ever wondered what your soul looks like? How big is it? Where is it?

Being spiritual, the soul does not have a physical appearance, but our human tendency is to imagine it in physical terms. One description is that it is the size of the heart and “placed” right next to it. Another is that the soul is in the inner core of the body as when we feel something “deep within.”

A third image that comes to mind is the old, glass milk bottle. I remember teachers explaining how sin affects the soul by having us imagine a glass bottle full of white milk. As we sin, our soul is darkened little by little just as adding chocolate powder to the milk darkens it.

The Catechism, however states, “The unity of the soul and body is so profound that one has to consider the soul to be the “form” of the body… spirit and matter, in man are not two natures united, but rather their union forms a single nature.” (CCC 365). That’s a big soul!

Our entire self is animated by God’s spirit, giving us life, both physical and spiritual. When we take good care of our bodies, it can help us spiritually and vice versa. For example, when we fast, we are training both body and soul not to be attached to only the physical things of this world. When we perform an act of kindness, it is our body and soul making that happen. And when we receive the Eucharist, we are nourishing both body and soul.

So the next time you hear the word soul mentioned, don’t think of an invisible heart or a glass milk bottle. It is not some separate part of you, it’s all of you!

Catholic Girl Journey

Practice losing control

Since I live alone, I’m responsible for everything in my home and in my life: cleaning, cooking, laundry, where to go, when to go, what to do, etc..They’re all my decisions (or sometimes indecisions). However, I often feel that I don’t “let go and let God” work in my life. I know He’s there, and I know He does, but sometimes I feel like I’m getting in the way. Lately, I’ve had the feeling that I needed to practice losing control, to totally not make any decisions, but to be open to what comes my way. How does one practice that? In my case, I decided to go on a “mystery tour.”

The mystery tour was sponsored by AAA and consisted of 5 days of travel. I only knew where to meet the tour group. We were given one or two clues for each day, and a general sense of what type of clothing to pack, but that was it. The tour was Wednesday through Sunday, and I had no idea if I was going to be able to attend Sunday Mass. This was totally outside of my comfort zone.

After I booked the trip, I enjoyed seeing people’s reactions when I told them I didn’t know where I was going on vacation. As the day grew closer, trepidation set in. It was hard for me to pack, since I didn’t know if I was going to places where stylish clothes would be appropriate or if we were going to be more casual.  I began to feel that I didn’t want to go. I had a knot in the middle of my stomach. I was afraid.

I had a million questions, but only asked a few to the AAA escort, who would smile and say, “You’ll see.” It was so hard to put my mind at rest and not question. After traveling and a bit of sightseeing on the way to our destination, the Finger Lakes region of New York state, as much as I enjoyed it, I so wanted to know what was next. It took another day or so, before I really started to relax and realize that each place I went, I enjoyed. If I had previous knowledge of what the tour was, I don’t know if I would have chosen it, but I’m glad I went. There were so many different places we visited; they seemed to appeal just a little to everyone. And the most important lesson was learning how to stop wondering and just enjoy where I was; to live in the moment.

It was not until Saturday evening when I heard the time of our departure, that I realized I may have an opportunity to go to Mass. After a few quick searches on my mobile phone, I found a church nearby that had a Mass at a time I could attend. I had my own little adventure within the trip, as I needed to arrange for a taxi to take me to church and back. I did have a concern that I would be late for the departure, but I focused on what I had to do, go to Mass and meet the taxi at the appointed time. It all worked out.

Now that I’ve returned to my daily routine, my challenge is to put the practice of “letting go” in my spiritual life and hoping for another successful “tour.”

Catholic Girl Journey

Flour, water, salt and yeast

“He offered them still another image: “The reign of God is like yeast which a woman took and kneaded into  three measures of flour. Eventually the whole mass of dough began to rise.””(Matthew 13:33)

This image came to mind as I was mixing bagel dough on Sunday morning. I love to bake and baking bread, in particular, is an artform. There are so many types of breads, rolls, bagels and sweet treats that can be made by using just a few simple ingredients and changing their proportion. I thought of how the amount of flour was always a greater proportion compared to the water, salt and yeast. Then in struck me that this could be an analogy for the Church. The  flour represents the people, the basic building block of the church. The water, representing the priests and religious, interacts with the flour and hydrates it. Their words and actions are “absorbed” by the people, enabling them to become united in the kingdom of God. The salt is the collection of the pope, cardinals and bishops guiding the church, encouraging a good flavor by keeping God’s commandments. The yeast is the Holy Spirit increasing the faith throughout the church.

While yeast itself will raise the dough through a chemical reaction, kneading is the catalyst which enhances the process. Yeast is important but dough needs to be worked, in a rhythmic, folding motion. This kneading slowly changes the dough, more felt by the hand than seen. Although the finished dough is visibly different, it is the product of a gradual change that can seem endless as the kneading motion is repeated again, and again, and again. Then the dough is left to rest, and the yeast has a chance to do its work.

Each recipe is different and the doughs looks different too. Some are stiff and some are loose. So too, the church, while remaining consistent in her teachings, has looked different as she reacted to the happenings in the world around it. There have been times of persecution, times of growth, times of challenge and discord, and times of peace and learning.

The final transformation of the dough is when it is baked in the oven. The temperature will depend on the recipe, size and additional ingredients. I’d like to think of this as comparison to purgatory. The heat does not destroy the dough, but transforms it into a fragrant and nourishing bread; what the mixture of flour, water, salt and yeast was truly meant to be.

Catholic Girl Journey

The glory of work

I’ve often heard the expression, “if it was fun, they wouldn’t call it work.” However, no matter how painful work may sometimes seem, it should not be seen as a drudgery, but rather a participation in God’s handiwork.

Through multiple recent reorganizations of the company where I work, I’ve been struggling to avoid becoming jaded and to continue caring about the work that I’m doing. This struggle is also spilling over into my home life, as I tend to procrastinate in my daily chores. After a day at the office, I want to have “me” time.

Searching for some resolution to this dilemma, in the past week, I came across two very different examples of, not the drudgery, but the glory of working. One was a video by Fr. Mike on Ascension Presents YouTube channel, called Letting God Take His Time. The other was a chapter in He Leadeth Me by Fr. Walter Ciszek.

Father Mike’s video demonstrates to me an aspect of work in which we can encounter God in every moment of our activity, and thus should not rush through a project but treasure this gift. He tells a story about building a pre-fab shed on an unlevel foundation. His co-worker wanted to disassemble what they had put together to level the foundation. He was in a hurry to get it completed so that he could move on to the next task. Rather than rushing through the building process and forcing the pieces to fit, going back to the beginning to level the foundation made the building go much smoother and faster. He points out, that we can never encounter God in the past or in the future. We can only encounter God in the present moment, in whatever we are doing in that moment. If we hurry out or are focused on past or future activities, then we miss the connection with God and doing His will in the everyday tasks.

In his book, Fr. Ciszek relates his experience of spending 23 years in the Soviet Gulag and how it affected his faith journey. Initially, his chapter about work made me feel badly for complaining about my job, compared to the severity of his servile prisoner work, which was beyond comprehension. He had to perform hard labor to earn mere sustenance. He struggled with the work as well, but came to an amazing perception about it: ”…all work, any work, has a value in itself. It has a value insofar as it partakes in the creative act of God. It has value insofar as it partakes of God’s redemptive acts. It has value in itself and a value for others.”

These examples demonstrated to me that if we allow ourselves to be instruments of God, He will work in us and through us in all moments, not just the ones that make us feel good. We can also call upon God for strength, patience, and aid in getting the job done. Even in paradise, there was work; in Genesis 1:15, God places man in the garden He created “to cultivate and care for it.”

So whether it is sitting in a seemingly endless conference call at the office or taking out the trash, we can participate in the work of God by being open to Him in the moment and doing the best job we can.

 

Catholic Girl Journey

Open wide

Open wide your ears, mind and heart and let the merciful healing love of God touch you. That is my summary of AbbeyFest 2016.

In order to enjoy the day, I first had to open my ears and listen: to what was said and what was sung. I also had to open my mind to what I was hearing; to not allow it to be background sounds but rather concentrate and let the messages be absorbed. While knowledge is good, it doesn’t mean much if you don’t put it into practice. Opening my heart, I took action by going to confession and passing through a Holy Door at Daylesford Abbey designated specially just for that day.           starsgodim

This year’s artists included Stars Go Dim, the Josh Blakesley Band and Sidewalk Prophets as well as a keynote address by Jeff Cavins. While each presented his  own witness to Christ, I think it was the lead singer from Stars Go Dim that amazed me the most. Chris Cleveland shared his personal story of medical issues he faced from early childhood, leaving him unable to hear in his left ear. Yet he continues to succeed in an industry where hearing is very important, giving all praise to God. It was a very cloudy start to the day, until they sang Praise God from Whom All Blessings Flow, at which the clouds parted , the sun shone down and peeks of blue sky became more visible. sidewalkprophetsWhen it was time for Mass, there was not a cloud in the sky.

Jeff Cavins gave an impactful and entertaining keynote speech that illustrated how knowing the faith is not the same as practicing the faith. He explained it by comparing it to his foray into photography: reading lots of magazines before buying a camera and then reading even more before he ever took a picture. I kept thinking about my hobby of spinning wool into yarn and how I approached it the opposite way. I learned to spin from a local group that met monthly. While I was encouraged to attend a spinning workshop, I felt I was not good enough. It took many years before I felt comfortable enough to go, only to find out all the bad habits that could have been avoided if I had attended the workshop as a new spinner. The same can be said for the faith, you can think you’re practicing it, but if you don’t learn about it – and continue to learn – you end up with habits that can be hard to break.

In this Year of Mercy we are all called to open wide to God’s mercy and experience His grace, especially when we participate in opportunities like AbbeyFest. What local events
can you take part in?

Catholic Girl Journey

Passing judgment

I feel sorry for the Pharisees of Jesus’ day. With all their knowledge and training, they were blind when they met God face-to-face in Jesus.

It often seems that when a gospel references the Pharisees, it’s usually in a negative manner. I wonder if God expected them to recognize Him and He was harsher on them than others. Or was it that — in their hearts — they enjoyed the power and prestige and did not want to change? The people that Jesus helped were the ones who asked it of Him, who believed that He could help them. The Pharisees viewed Jesus and his ways as a threat and judged Him to be a usurper of the order they knew so well. Jesus challenged the people of his day: from speaking to women to giving a new way of living in the Beatitudes. Perhaps there was something stirred in their hearts, as they were angered enough to look for ways to put Jesus to death.

It’s easy to look at the Pharisees as “them,” and say that we’re not like them. However, in saying that, are we any different? In Luke 18:10-14, the Pharisee and the tax collector are praying in the Temple. The Pharisee is praising his own efforts and how much better he is than others, including the tax collector. Christians and Catholics fall into this sort of thinking all too often: the “I” or “we” versus the “they” and “them.” When we pass judgments on others, whether it is true or not, we distance ourselves from them, making them inferior to us. We also distance ourselves from God, as He is the true and only just judge, and we are merely grasping at His power. In our zealousness for the faith, we can create division instead of setting an example of living our faith.

John’s gospel (3:1-21) tells us of one Pharisee who visited Jesus at night, Nicodemus. Jesus gave him the following reminder, “But he who acts in truth comes into the light, to make clear that his deeds are done in God.” Let our deeds be those of the children of God and leave the judging to God alone.

Catholic Girl Journey

Receive the gift

How receptive are you? Do you allow others to assist you? Do you appreciate compliments?

At a Sunday afternoon retreat, the speaker made one point about allowing ourselves to “receive the gift.” This could be anything from an offer to pay for a meal to a compliment on what we are wearing, to a door being held open. In our culture of being self sufficient, it can be a  difficult thing to grasp. How many times have people responded, “this old thing?” when complimented on their dress? Perhaps when eating in a restaurant with friends, one person may offer to pay, but how many people will speak up to say it’s not necessary? Or even that someone else will get it next time? Why do we feel the need to make everything equal?

I think one of the greatest examples of receiving is my 85-year-old dad who has Parkinson’s. As the disease progresses, he gets slower and even the small daily activities are monumental tasks. He is constantly thanking me when I visit for all the help I give both him and my mom. Part of me thinks that since he’s my dad, of course I want to help; I love him and don’t like to see him struggle. Another part is being appreciative of all he did to raise me, it’s now my turn to help him. I know I can never pay like for like, but I want to use the opportunity to show my love in action, rather than just saying it. It also makes me wonder if I could be even half as gracious and appreciative if I was in that state?

God wants to bless us and give us gifts. But are we open to accepting them? Or do we get annoyed when they are not quite what we wanted or don’t happen the way we expect? Can we just receive God’s gift with a smile and say thank you, regardless of what it is? Perhaps if we can practice with the earthly things that others give to us, we can be more receptive of those that come from God.

Thank you for reading the blog!   

 

Catholic Girl Journey

Thou shall…

The 10 commandments, the golden rule, the beatitudes; these are all things we “have” to do, right?

To many, religion is a list of rules. I don’t see it that way. I see it as the expression of my faith in God. I want to have a relationship with Him, so that He can bring out the best in me. When we strike up a friendship with someone, they can often bring out elements of ourselves that we didn’t know existed. When a friend asks our assistance with something, we do our best to accommodate their request, even if it means changing our plans. Our friendship with God is no different; just being in His presence can cause subtle differences. We start looking for ways to share His joy, which can be by living out the directives that both the Father and Jesus gave.

A great example is the third commandment to keep holy the sabbath day. For Catholics, that means going to Mass either for the vigil on Saturday or on Sunday. It can be referred to as our “Sunday obligation.” What does it mean to be obliged? While the definition uses words like ‘require,’ ‘constrain’ and ‘bind,’ there is one definition that I think fits better. “To place under a debt of gratitude for some benefit, favor, or service.” When we have a relationship with God, we appreciate all He has done for us, from creating us and everything and everyone we come into contact with, to becoming one of us in order to save us. It’s our thankfulness that leads us to have that ‘debt of gratitude’ and, since we cannot do for God what He has done, we take the time each week to seek out His presence.

If we look only at the rules and regulations, then we are missing the point of a relationship with God. What we do (or not do) does not create the relationship with God. Rather our relationship with Him leads us to take action, to want to do better and be the best person we can be. Using the directives like the commandments and the beatitudes helps us to see how we can take action and show our love and joy in God.